


Hors de Combat, Book Three

by thebasement_archivist



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Fiction, M/M, Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-09-12
Updated: 2003-09-12
Packaged: 2018-11-20 10:51:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 43,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11334249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebasement_archivist/pseuds/thebasement_archivist
Summary: A Late-ish birthday gift for Ursula and the last of the series.





	Hors de Combat, Book Three

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alice ttlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [The Basement](http://fanlore.org/wiki/The_Basement), which moved to the AO3 to ensure the stories are always available and so that authors may have complete control of their own works. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [The Basement's collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/thebasement/profile).

Hors de Combat, Book Three

### Hors de Combat, Book Three

#### by Liz OBrien

  


Disclaimer: Yeah, we know. Chris Carter, who really should be spanked for the farce he left us with. Not that I'm bitter. 

* * *

The unfamiliar warmth of a body beside her woke Dana early in the morning. She blinked at her unfamiliar surroundings until her scattered thoughts began to coalesce and an image emerged of she and Alex Krycek locked together in shared passion. She sat up with a jolt and realized, when Alex flew out of the bed and ripped a gun out from under the mattress, that he'd been still asleep beside her. 

He held the gun on her for the brief moment it took him to recognize her, then angled it slightly to the ceiling with a soft curse. His bare body looked ludicrous coupled with his threatening stance and Dana couldn't hold back a brief snicker. He rolled his eyes and clicked on the gun's safety. 

"Good morning to you, too," she said with another laugh as he returned the gun to its hiding place and sat on the bed. His eyes were solemn and thoughtful and his stubbled face looked haggard in the grey light of the winter dawn. She waited for him to say something but nothing came and finally she reached for his hand and pulled him back down beside her. 

"You're not much for pillow talk, are you?" she asked, finally sobering a bit. 

"I'm a little surprised. I never saw this coming." He lay on his side, one arm pillowing his head, and regarded her carefully, looking for hints of disappointment or guilt. 

"It's okay, Alex," she assured him quietly. "I'm surprised, too, but I'm not sorry." She turned to face him and put a hand on his bare chest. "It was really nice, by the way." The sly grin was back and this time he returned it with a broad smile of his own. 

"Yeah, it was nice," he agreed. He laughed suddenly and rolled onto his back. 

"What?" she asked. 

"This...me, you...what kind of odds would have you given for something like this a year ago?" 

They laughed together until Dana moved closer to him, leaning above him and running her hand up and down his chest. Alex's laugh died away and he gave her a questioning look. Her smile turned secretive and sultry and she bent down to kiss his mouth softly. 

"Miss Scully, are you coming on to me?" he asked archly. 

"What if I am, Mr. Krycek?" 

He didn't answer with words, instead pulling her back for another kiss. Soon enough, they were joined again, but this time there was no specter of Mulder lying between them. 

It was close to noon when Alex woke up. His body was suffused with the languid fatigue of long, lazy sex, but his empty stomach reminded him noisily that he'd eaten practically nothing in the last three days. He was alone in his bed, but he could hear cooking noises from the kitchen. He got up and pulled on his sweats, forgoing a shirt and, catching sight of his reflection in the mirror of his dresser, smirked at the scattering of hickeys along his neck and shoulder. 

Dana was scrambling eggs and he could smell bacon as well. He poured himself a cup of coffee before stepping behind her and planting a warm kiss on the back of her neck. 

"That smells great," he sighed. "I'm starving." 

"I figured you'd been living on a liquid diet the last few days. Butter the toast, will you?" 

They worked as well in the kitchen as they had in the lab all those weeks. Just before they sat down to eat, Dana suddenly remembered one of the reasons she'd wanted to see him the night before. 

"Go ahead, I'll be right back," she said. 

She returned quickly, carrying her purse and rummaging in it, finally pulling out two small, gaily wrapped presents. She set them down next to Alex's plate, then took the seat beside him. 

"What's this?" he asked. 

"They're called gifts," she answered snidely. "People traditionally exchange them this time of year." 

He called her a nasty name, then rose from his seat, the gifts still unopened on the table. "I've got something for you, too, even though you're such a little snot." 

He came back with two packages as well. He set them in front of her and pointed at the larger one. 

"That's for Will, when he gets back." 

"And this is for me?" she asked, shaking the flat parcel. 

"Yeah," he said as he picked up the smaller of his packages. "Open up." 

He finished unwrapping before her and set the result on the table in front of him. He stared at it in absolute bewilderment, looking to Dana with a woeful and confused expression. She laughed heartily, then took pity on him. 

"It's a picture frame," she said, rolling her eyes. 

"I'll take your word for it," he responded warily. All he'd been sure of was that the object was painted an extremely bright blue and had soccer balls stamped on it. 

"It's made of Popsicle sticks. Will made it in Cub Scouts." 

"It's...very colorful," he said politely, finally picking the thing up and turning it back and forth, trying to figure out how it worked. 

Dana laughed again, then said, "I have one just like it, only mine is painted the most lurid pink you can imagine. And it has daisies all over it. He's eight, at the height of gender stereo-typing." She shrugged philosophically. "It'll pass. Go on, open the other one." 

"Nope, your turn," he replied, setting the frame down gingerly. 

She pulled apart the wrapping, then stared speechlessly at the beautifully executed charcoal drawing of Mulder, sitting against a sturdy tree trunk, a chubby, curly-haired toddler cuddling against his chest. 

Her eyes stayed on the picture as she said softly, "This is Will? He was with you, too?" 

"Yeah, for a little while," Alex answered gently. "I had a sketch of that in one of my journals and I reworked it, cleaned it up a little. I know you didn't get to see him when he was that age..." He broke off when she finally looked up at him, tears spilling down her cheeks. 

"Hey, Dana, I didn't mean to upset you, I thought..." 

"No," she interjected hastily. "I'm not upset, not one bit." She leaned toward him, wrapping her arms around his neck. "You took care of them and brought them back to me." She kissed his cheek and whispered, "I would have lost them both without you, Alex." 

After a few minutes, she stood back, sniffling lightly and sat down again. "Open yours, now." 

Alex picked up the small package and unwrapped it quickly. He stared almost the same way Dana had when she'd opened his gift. His hands were unsteady as he looked through the stack of cassette tapes and he turned one over and read the back 

"What...what made you think of this?" he asked quietly and she wondered if he was angry again. 

"You don't have any, I checked. And the Internet is an amazing thing, you can find anything." 

"Even recordings of concerts from thirty years ago, apparently." 

"Well, the Cincinnati Youth Symphony and the Oberlin College String Orchestra probably weren't bestsellers, so they came cheap." 

"Dana," Alex rasped, "I can't believe you did this." 

"Are you angry? I just wanted you to have something..." 

"From before," he finished. "No, I'm not angry. And I don't have any recordings of...any of it. My mother had them, I don't know what she did with them when she left." He gave her a melancholy smile. "Do you know, I remember when I thought that the worst thing that could happen to me was having to go to Symphony on a Saturday morning." 

She smiled in return. "Little did we know, huh?" 

"Yeah," he said. He tipped his chair far enough back to reach the radio/tape player that sat on a nearby counter. Dana rifled through the tapes and handed one to him. 

"I'd really like to hear this one. Some guy named Kryshenkov plays the cello concerto." 

He took the tape from her and put it in the player, feeling an enormous wave of longing to be fifteen again sweep over him with the opening strains of the cello. He remembered how hard that piece had been to master, how he'd nervously played with his tie before going onstage and then the thrill of triumph as he played flawlessly to an auditorium full of genuine applause. 

As the last notes faded, he turned off the tape. "That's enough for now," he said gruffly. "Too much nostalgia is bad for me." 

"It was lovely. You play beautifully." 

"I used to," he admitted. "Not anymore. Been too many years." He flipped through the rest of the tapes, then set them aside and finished eating. 

They didn't talk much as they cleaned up the dishes. Dana was wearing Alex's too-big robe, her own clothes unpleasantly smoky and musty. Alex offered to throw her things in the washer while she took a shower. He had just finished moving the load of clothes to the dryer when the phone rang. 

When Dana came out of the shower, still in Alex's robe, he was sitting at the kitchen table with a notebook open in front of him, talking in rapid Russian on the phone. He waved her to a seat and she took it, stage-whispering, "Is that Anna?" 

He nodded without breaking his conversation and she peered at his writing, trying to decipher the jumble of Cyrillic and English words. Once or twice, while Alex spoke, he ran his hand through his hair or across his face and Dana, seeing the familiar gestures and picking up Mulder's name among the conversation, knew Alex was telling Anna the outcome of their work. 

At last, he stood up and, with a final few words, handed the phone to Dana. 

"Anna wants to talk to you," he said. Scully took the phone from him and he immediately went into the family room. She greeted Anna and wished her a Merry Christmas, but Anna started right in on the healing. 

"So, Dr. Scully, Alex tells me this is not working? Nothing is happening with your Mulder?" 

"No, Anna, I'm afraid not. There were very small improvements after about two weeks, but nothing to indicate an increase in brain function. And there haven't been any changes in over a month. If it looked like there was any improvement, I'd keep it up, but..." 

"Alex tells me that you are worried for your son. I know he is angry to be ending the work, but you are most likely right. With no significant improvement in all this time, the healing is not working." 

There was a short pause, then Anna said gently, "I told Alex that it would be very hard to heal Mulder. He did not want to believe that and I'm sorry if he has been unhappy or angry with you. Alex doesn't like to fail. He isn't accustomed to it, I think. So, how is your son? William, that is his name?" 

The quick change in subject caught Dana off guard for a moment, then she replied, "He's very well, thank you for asking. He's spending the week with his uncle and cousins, learning to ski." 

"That's good, that he has family to be with. It will help him when he misses his father, yes? To have an uncle?" 

"Yes, he has two uncles, my brothers. And there are other men in his life that can give him the things Mulder and I can't," Scully answered, then went on impulsively, voicing something that she hadn't realized until then. "I had hoped Alex could be part of that for him. Will likes him so much and they had been getting quite friendly while he and I were working together." 

"I can tell that, to hear Alex talk about your son. William must be a great comfort to you now. And you are right to think of what your son needs, even if it goes against what you want so badly. Alex doesn't understand that. He has no one that he cares for that way. It will be good for him to come home to his family, just like it's good for William to have his. Be thankful for what you have, Dr. Scully and try not to mourn too much for what you may have lost." 

"I'll try, Anna. You know, I was a stranger to you and you know some of what was between Alex and I. And you still did so much to help me, I can't thank you enough for your kindness. Alex is lucky to have someone like you in his life." 

"Hmmph, he doesn't always think so. But he will come home and we will see what we can do with him, Dmitri and I. We will take care of him for you." 

Scully was speechless for a moment at this pronouncement, then said cautiously, "What exactly did Alex tell you, Anna?" 

"Not very much. Enough to know that you and he have been a comfort to each other during this work. And whatever went before, he is not that man you hated anymore, is he?" 

"No, he's not. I'll miss him very much when he leaves. I wish I could convince him to stay," Dana confessed. 

"No," Anna said gently. "Staying there wouldn't be good for Alex. He needs to hide and tend his wounds for a time, like before. When you are hurting, you go to your brothers or mother, yes? So with Alex, he needs to be with family." 

"I understand. I've come to ..." Dana didn't know what word to put to her thought. 'Care for him' sounded too intimate. She and Alex reflected their mutual need off each other and without that connection, she felt like she was losing more of Mulder than if she'd never laid eyes on Alex Krycek again. "Well, whatever it is, I'll miss it and I'll miss him." 

"Then something good has come from all this work you have done, yes? You made a friend and so did Alex. It never happens that only bad comes from this world, Doctor. I hope someday Alex realizes that." 

"Me, too, Anna. Take good care of him." 

"Always, Dr. Scully. Take good care of yourself and your boy." 

Dana disconnected the call and set the phone back in its cradle, then went looking for Alex. She found him in the family room, leaning against the half-open sliding door, blowing smoke from his cigarette into the yard. He heard her come to stand behind him and wasn't surprised to feel her arms slip around his waist. He flicked the cigarette into the yard and turned into her embrace. 

She leaned her head back to look up at him, trying to measure his mood. There was none of the lingering pain and anger she'd gotten used to seeing over the last few days, but he still looked sad. She held him tighter, resting her head on his chest and felt his arms tighten around her as well. 

She rocked him back and forth gently, as she would have rocked Will when he was sad, and smiled to think how they must look, with Alex towering over her and letting her comfort him. 

"I'm okay, Dana," he said after a quiet minute. 

"Good," she replied. "Me, too." She looked up at him again with a smile and their eyes locked for a long ripening moment. Then Alex found himself bending to her at the same time she reached to pull him into a heated kiss, the passion between them kindling yet again. 

Alex backed her down the hallway, never releasing their kiss as he propelled her into his bedroom and toppled her onto his bed. They landed, still kissing, their mouths searing and hungry against each other. 

He finally pulled away, leaning his forehead to hers and trying to steady his breathing. He framed her head with his bent arms and cradled her delicate face with his strong hands and when their eyes locked again, his fingers drifted across her smooth cheek. They lay, staring and studying each other until Alex had to look away. 

"Are we looking to be somewhat happier again?" he asked softly. 

She reached to stroke his face as well while she thought about her answer. "I think...I just want something normal and sane for a little while." 

Alex laughed, the sound full of quiet derision. "There's nothing normal or sane about you and I in bed together." 

"We can pretend, can't we?" she asked. "Come on, Alex. You're leaving, Mulder's still gone, I have to be a tough momma for William...can't we just forget about it for now and act like regular people?" 

He nodded silently, then lowered his mouth to hers once more. 

* * *

Dana took another shower very late the next afternoon while Alex slept yet again. She had the feeling he'd been sleeping poorly for some time, given the ease with which he'd dropped off on her a couple times now. He'd looked beyond exhausted when he'd opened the door to her Tuesday night and they hadn't done much sleeping until late Wednesday morning. Now it was Thursday afternoon and they hadn't made it out of his bedroom. 

She washed very gently between her legs, sure she had bruises or friction burns or whatever happens to the sensitive skin of an inner thigh when another person's fuzzy leg has been rubbing at it for the better part of two days. 

She now knew every square inch of Alex's body, knew how hellishly ticklish his belly was, knew that kissing him on the inside of his upper arm gave him gooseflesh. The one time he'd let her go down on him, she'd learned that his voice rose at least one octave and more probably two when his prostate gland was properly stimulated. 

To be fair, he could give a fairly detailed description-visual, tactile, taste and smell, of her nether regions if anyone asked and he'd acquired a knack for kissing his way up and down the column of her back that seemed to liquefy bone, muscle and brain cells indiscriminately. 

She'd been in the shower for close to twenty minutes, scrubbing herself lazily, her mind wandering over the last few days, a dreamy smile on her face, when Alex peered in. He watched her hands slicking up and down her skin with an avid stare for a few moments before letting her know he was there. 

"What'cha doing, Dana?" 

"Nothing much," she answered lightly, flicking her dripping fingers at him. "Wasting natural resources, mostly." 

"Well, you know what they say about water conservation, don't you?" 

Her smile broadened into a grin, but she let him finish. 

"Shower with a friend." And he stepped into the enclosure, took the scrubber from her, and began gently scouring her back. 

She let her head droop, luxuriating in the pleasurable cleansing and wondering what it would be like after he left. 

"Alex," she said after a while, "Are you sure about going back to Anna's? Couldn't you think about staying here? I know things aren't how you wanted them to be, but ...you could stay, couldn't you? Will and I ...you've come to mean a lot to both of us. You could make a life here." 

His hands stopped their soothing motion. "Doing what, wiping up puke at Townsend?" he asked bitterly. 

"We could clear your record, you know that. You could take your old name back, use your degree, have the kind of career you wanted before..." 

He stepped under the shower spray and began washing himself with quick, angry movements while he answered her. 

"Before," he snorted rudely. "Fat fucking chance. That's not going to happen, Dana. And I'm not staying here, watching him rot in that bed and getting tangled up with you and Will." 

"But..." 

"There's no 'but'!" he shouted, whirling to face her. "Staying here is going to kill me, one way or another! Either him or you or somebody from my fucked up past..." 

He shut the water off and grabbed a towel before stalking naked from the room, the door slamming viciously behind him. 

She stayed in the bathroom, giving him a chance to soothe himself while she tried to understand why he'd gotten so angry so fast. She shook her head impatiently, wondering if she'd ever figure him out. After she'd finger-combed her damp curls into a tiny bit of order, she went looking for him, finding him in his room, towel around his hips, sitting slumped at his desk. 

"Hey," she said softly, leaning against the door. "What are you doing?" 

"Thinking." 

"Do I need to ask about what?" 

He didn't answer as she came into the room and stood behind him, the robe she wore absorbing the drops that still wet his back when she wrapped her arms around him. He didn't shrug her away like she had expected. Instead, he leaned his head back against her breast and sighed heavily. 

"I'm ready for this to be over," he finally said in a husky voice. "I'm so tired of everything being so complicated, I just want something simple." 

She laughed very gently and held him tight. "Nobody ever said loving someone was simple, Alex. And Mulder-simple is the last word I'd use to describe him." 

"True," Alex replied wearily, rubbing against her again. He reached around to grasp her arm and gently tugged at her, pulling her to sit on the desk. He picked something up from the desktop and fiddled with it mindlessly. 

"I'd like to ask you for a favour, Miss Scully," he said after another sigh. 

She gave him a pert smile and said, "I think I've done you plenty of favours lately, buster." 

He smiled a bit wanly in return, then took her hand and laid something in the palm. She recognized it-the first ring he'd made, the one he said was ruined because his focus was wrong. 

"I'd like you to give that to Mulder when this is finally over." He kept his eyes on the top of his desk and missed the pain that flashed into her face. "When you go to burn him or bury him or whatever you do at the end, I'd ...I'd appreciate it if that went with him." 

He raised his eyes finally, a look of weak defiance on his face, like someone who didn't ask favours often and expected them to be refused when he did. He closed her fingers around the ring, kept holding her hand and brushed a soft kiss against it. 

"Will you do that for me? So part of me is with him?" 

Dana let her closed hand rest on Alex's cheek and leaned in to kiss him as tenderly as he'd kissed her hand. 

"If that's what you want. But it's your ring, Alex, and you made it full of thoughts of how much you love him. You should be the one to give it to him." 

"I won't be here when it's over." 

"Then give it to him before you go." 

"No," he shook his head slowly. "You don't need to see it every day and be reminded of all this crap." 

Dana's eyes flashed angrily. "'All this crap'...you love him, don't you? That's not crap, Alex, it's wonderful, especially for Mulder who had so little love in his life." 

She shoved the ring back into his hand and, like he had done, curled his fingers closed around it. 

"You give it to him, before you leave." She softened her voice before she went on. "He deserves to know, doesn't he, Alex? And I think it will help you move on from this." 

She leaned close to wrap her arms around his neck and kissed his forehead. He let his head sag against her shoulder and took a deep, shaky breath before nodding his agreement. 

"Okay," he whispered. "I'll give it to him." 

"And tell him you love him?" she prodded gently. 

He gave a tiny soft laugh. "Yes, boss lady." 

She pulled his chin up so he met her eyes. "It will help, Alex. Closure and all that good stuff." 

Alex stood beside Mulder's bed and felt a familiar knot tighten in his stomach. Dana had walked as far as the lounge with him, given him a quick kiss on the cheek and said she'd wait for him. Then she pushed him down the hall toward Mulder's room. 

Now he looked at the beautiful, infuriatingly placid face and his hands clenched nervously. Unbelievable, he thought, that one man could twist a person's whole life around without even trying. He sat on the bed and took Mulder's hand, trying to collect the words that went with the disorganized clumps of emotion he'd let pile up in his head and heart for so long. 

"I don't know how to do this, Lis," he finally began awkwardly, toying with the elegant fingers that could spark so many heated memories. 

"Do you remember calling me a cold bastard, when I shot the guards at that lab? That pissed me off, cut right through me. You thought I was cold when all the time I was so fucking in love with you. Are you surprised to hear that, Lisa? Dana says you knew, that you weren't stupid. So maybe I'm not saying anything you don't already know. But for what it's worth, I love you. I think I always will." 

Alex leaned back against the wall and pulled the still figure into his arms. He fished the ring out of his pocket and held it up, watching the gold wink in the light. "So, according to your girlfriend, I'm supposed to give you this and I'll feel all better about everything." 

He slipped the ring onto the finger with the other rings and pulled Mulder even closer, tucking the cropped head under his chin and bringing the hand sporting the rings to his mouth to kiss it. 

"Between you and me, Dana's full of crap. I don't feel any better. I still miss you so much. More now than I did when you left." He dropped a kiss on Mulder's head and held him tightly for another moment. "Love you, Lis." 

Alex rolled away from Mulder and off the bed, then stood looking at the withered body, wondering if any of his words had made it into the man's battered brain. He finally turned away from the bed and walked out of the room and down the hallway. 

He flopped onto the couch beside Dana, who cuddled his head against her shoulder. 

"You okay?" she asked against his soft, black hair. She could see strands of grey that hadn't been there last spring. 

"I'm fine." 

"Ready to go?" 

"Yeah. Let's just say good night and get the hell out of here." They stood up and walked down the hall together, not noticing the interested glances the nurses at the desk gave them. 

Dana went to Mulder's side and, like she did each time she said goodbye to him, picked up his hand and kissed it, then bent to kiss his forehead, saying, "Love you, Babe. See you later." 

Alex stroked Mulder's other hand and kissed the man's cheek. Dana heard him whisper something in Russian next to Mulder's ear, then straighten up. The two of them almost knocked heads as he stood and Dana gave a half-hearted chuckle at the near miss, then the heat between them rose again as their eyes met. They stared at each other for one of those lingering moments that felt like a million years, then Alex's hand touched her cheek gently. 

"Dana," he whispered, and pulled her close, kissing her with growing hunger. She met him eagerly, opening her mouth under the impatient press of his tongue and her hand wrapped in his hair for a moment. 

Then a page was called over the loudspeaker and she turned away, shaking and embarrassed. 

"Not...not here, Alex." 

He pulled her back to him. "Come home with me, then. One more night." 

She looked away, back at Mulder, his blank face oblivious, and the bitter thought came to her that she could fuck Alex right there, he could take her bent over that bed with her face in Mulder's, she could come screaming in the man's ear and it wouldn't make one damned bit of difference. 

"All right," she whispered. 

It was after midnight and they were still fucking. Dana had mounted him in a fit of impatience after a tantalizing, teasing episode of mutual oral sex. She'd be picking up Will soon and Alex was leaving soon and that would be that. She found herself wanting to run through every position in the Kama Sutra with him, to taste his seed on her tongue and push his head between her legs again. 

Something of her urgency must have shown in her face, because Alex put his hand on her shoulder to slow her motions and said, "Easy, Dana, there's time." 

He pulled her into a kiss, then rolled them, reversing their position and taking slower strokes into her. She kept her eyes open and watched his face, so easy for her to read now, so different from the sullen, cynical man she'd met again back in the Spring. 

Her hands reached up to cup his lovely face, fingering his soft, generous mouth and smoothing through his dark, rich hair. 

"So beautiful," she murmured. 

He lowered his gaze with a surprisingly shy laugh and Dana pulled his chin so his eyes met hers again. As intimate as their bodies were, somehow their eyes holding pulled them even closer together. 

He moved harder and faster against her and she lifted her legs to bring him in deeper. As her pleasure gained momentum, she felt oddly like crying. Then she was peaking, orgasm rolling and radiating along her body, drowning everything but the burning, engulfing sensations. 

Alex still watched her, watched her eyes roll back and her face twist in pleasure, felt the tightening pulse of her orgasm pulling him deeper into her body and knew he was only seconds away from coming, too. And then he was flying over the edge and the roar in his ears drowned out her voice as he poured himself once more into her trembling body. 

* * *

Another morning came and now Dana was accustomed to the warm breath in her hair and the gentle arm around her waist. She had spent the last three nights with Alex, popping home once for spare clothes and making a few phone calls to Charlie and Maggie to let them know she was alive. 

Now, Will was coming home today. Dana was meeting Charlie and Yvonne at her mother's and, that, she thought morosely, would be the end of this thing she and Alex had cobbled together. 

She shifted restlessly against Alex's chest and he began to stir. She watched him wake up, the green eyes finally opening and a drowsy smile blooming across his face. 

"Morning," he said, his voice croaky from sleep. 

"Morning, yourself," she answered and wiggled up high enough to kiss him. He clutched her closer to him and, still kissing him, smiled when his heated and hardening penis pressed into her belly. 

"You have an amazing recovery rate for a forty-something, you know that?" she said impishly when they stopped to grab a breath. "Maybe we should send you out to stud." 

He laughed with her, then shook his head with a loud, mocking sigh. "Sadly, the Kryshenkov gene pool has been dried up for some time. Too bad, huh?" 

Dana looked at him, her fingers idly twirling in his hair. "What does that mean, 'dried up'?" 

"That means..." he said in between kisses across her neck and shoulders, "that I had a vasectomy when I was 25. One of the benefits of working for Spender and Co. They had a top-notch medical plan, all the best doctors." 

He looked up at her with an abbreviated smile. "The more chilling aspects of all that medical cutting-edge stuff didn't really occur to me back then." He lowered his head again, moving down to her breasts, but Dana tugged him back up to meet her eyes. 

"Why would Spender want you to have a vasectomy? What did he care?" 

"Spender didn't have anything to do with it. I wanted to have it done." 

"Why would you do that, Alex?" 

"When the alternative was bringing a kid with my father's blood into this godforsaken world?" He rolled onto his back and Dana took advantage of the open space to lie on her stomach, chin propped on her arms and a somber stare fixed on him. 

"I think that may be the saddest thing I've heard about you, Alex." 

"What?" he asked. 

"That you gave up your chance at being a father." 

"Christ, I didn't want kids, I never did. After all the crap with Mikhail..." He shuddered and she moved closer, putting a soothing hand on his bare chest. 

"But it's awful, that you gave up hope so young." 

He gave a cynical snort of laughter. "Maybe you were still young when you were 25. I wasn't." 

Her eyes dropped as she remembered being 25, a fresh-faced medical student with countless dreams and hopes lying in a shiny path before her. Alex could almost hear her thoughts, comparing her life to his and he took her chin in his hand and pulled her face back up to look at him, his expression severe. 

"Don't bother feeling sorry, Dana. I told you, it's a crappy world. You grab the good stuff that comes your way and deal with the rest of it the best you can." 

He dropped his mouth to hers suddenly and kissed her, deepening the embrace without hesitation. He chased after her tongue, until he felt her trying to speak. He broke off the kiss and, still holding her chin, asked roughly, "Are you feeling sorry for me?" 

He waited for her to meet his eyes and, when she did, looked carefully for anger or fear or reluctance. But they were blue-black again, and she shook her head. " No, Alex. Not sorry. Just...sympathetic. Is that all right?" 

He still watched her face closely, searching now for any hint of pity. She let him look, not blinking or looking away and, after a moment, began to stroke his chest again. She wasn't trying to soothe him now; rather she had every intention of provoking the heat that still simmered between them. She let her fingers circle his flat nipple softly, still meeting his eyes easily and smiled softly at the tiny breath he sucked in when she pinched him lightly. 

"I don't feel sorry for you, Alex," she whispered huskily. "I think you've made some bad choices and you're working with the consequences." 

He kept staring at her until she pulled him into a blistering kiss that was as sudden and relentless as his had been. 

"Does that feel like pity to you, Krycek?" she asked, pulling away from the kiss with a loud smack. Her busy fingers suddenly moved in a brief harsh twist at each nipple and she smiled at the way he arched into the rough touch. 

"How about that? Does that feel like pity? Do you think the last week has been about feeling sorry for you?" 

She kissed him again and he responded more keenly this time, then said against her eager mouth, "You talk too much, girl." 

* * *

A fuzzy beeping crept into Alex's dream and dragged him awake. He lay still with Dana curled against him, trying to figure out what the sound was. It took a moment, but he realized it was a fax coming through. 

With a stifled, tired grunt, he slid away from Dana's warmth and padded out to his computer in the family room. Two pages lay in the printer tray and he picked them up, quickly reading the Russian characters. 

It was from a travel agency near Anna's farm, listing flights from Washington and Baltimore into the two airports nearest her home during the next month. A handwritten note from an anonymous agent told him that his aunt had purchased an open ticket for him and the agency would be waiting to hear from him to finalize his travel arrangements. 

He sat on the couch, re-reading the papers and trying to make his mind work out a plan for returning to Russia. He got up and began pacing the length of the room, an unfamiliar mental clutter keeping his thoughts swirling. He gave up planning and headed back down the hall to his bedroom, telling himself he was still emotionally and mentally exhausted from the last week. 

He got back into bed and Dana migrated to his side again immediately, one pale, freckled arm draping his hip, the other curled under her chin. With Dana sleeping beside him, it seemed like his heavy thoughts of Mulder scattered easily. Her warmth was solid and comfortable against his skin and it chased away the wispy memories that were always uppermost in his mind. 

He bent to kiss the top of her bed-rumpled head and she moved in closer to him, sighing softly and then, to his amused delight, smacking her lips childishly. 

His last thought before he drifted back to sleep was that he was going to miss Dana almost as much as Mulder. 

Dana drove home from Hopkins, her early impressions of the new semester rattling in her mind. She had a stray thought or two about what to make for dinner and whether she should refinance the house. Normal, every day thoughts, except that woven in and around them, giving them a distracting patina, were thoughts of Alex. 

Always, somewhere near the top of the pile of things she thought about every day, was Alex. She hadn't seen him in over a week, since he'd taken them out to dinner the night after Will's return from Charlie's. 

She pulled into the driveway, checking the clock automatically to see how far ahead of Will's bus she was. He'd be home in an hour, plenty of time for her to change clothes and have some quiet time to try to settle her mind. That morning, for the second day in a row, she found herself thinking of Alex first thing, even before her usual brief and lonely thoughts of Mulder. 

She changed into jeans and an old flannel shirt that Mulder had worn for yard work, needing comfort, but not wanting to think about that too much. She wandered aimlessly through her own home, feeling dissatisfied and out of sorts until she made her way down to the basement. 

She played a half-hearted game of pool, but got bored quickly and plunked the cue down with a yawn. She sorted through a box of magazines-mostly obscure journals Mulder had picked up over the years. Alex had been reading through them during the nights he had slept on the couch. 

She looked idly through a stack of CD's that had collected downstairs while she and Alex had worked together all those months ago. Flipping through the covers, she realized Alex still had a couple discs he had borrowed long ago and she made a quick note to let him know he had them. She tried very hard to ignore the quickening of her heartbeat at the thought of calling him. 

She also avoided analyzing the rush of pleasurable remembrance at some of the lively conversations the two of them had shared about music and books, about college reminiscences, about the hundred different things she had discovered in him over the course of almost a year. 

She found herself sitting on the couch-Alex's couch, she suddenly thought-and picked up the scratchy wool blanket he had slept under so many times. She wrapped herself under it and thought about him, how much she would miss him when he left, how much she was missing the time they had spent working together. 

She caught herself holding the blanket to her nose and inhaling, searching for and reveling in the scent of faded cologne, stale cigarette smoke and, oddly enticing, a faint whiff of hospital soap. And that was when she realized that she was pining for Alex Krycek. 

* * *

Alex hung up the phone with a slam, having abruptly ended a conversation with Anna about his still-nebulous plans to come to the farm. She hadn't meant to push, he knew that, but all her questions had irritated him almost beyond his ability to be polite and respectful.

He sat glumly on the couch, watching the winter sun drop lower, wondering what the hell was wrong with him. His mental lethargy wasn't getting any better. He knew, he knew, he needed to get his ass back to Russia. He needed to get out of the Mulder-laden atmosphere he was in, to be somewhere safe and simple and sane. 

So why was he sitting here, hour after hour each day, when he should have been making plans to grab that simple life he'd craved for so long? That's what he wanted, right? That's why he needed to pick up the damned phone, apologize to Anna, then call the damned travel agency and reserve the damned flight. But every time he picked it up and began punching in numbers, he found one reason or another to postpone any decisive action. 

He pushed away the persistent desire to call Dana and talk over his confused ideas with her. Thoughts of Dana had been clamoring their way to the front of his mind since she had slipped out of his bed to pick up Will. He'd seen them once, taking them to dinner the night after Will's return. 

Their conversation had been peppered with Will's commentary on his trip to Uncle Charlie's, on how much he loved skiing and how good he was at it-an arrogant Mulder to the bone, Alex had thought. 

He had carefully skirted Dana's questions about finalizing his plans that night and he hadn't talked to her since. He kept telling himself she was too busy with the start of a new semester to bother her and that, if they did get together, they would probably just end up screwing like minks and that wouldn't help him clear up his thoughts any. 

The sun was down now and a pale winter moon was rising over his yard. He'd been sitting for hours again, one more day shot to hell with useless musing. He ran a perturbed hand through his hair a few times and began his litany of reasons to go back to Russia again. 

The word that stayed with him through all his morose pondering was 'simple.' He wanted to be somewhere where he could count on people to say and do straightforward things for rational reasons. He wanted honesty and forthrightness around him. 

He wanted to have tangible proof, at the end of a day, that he had done something productive, even if it was just collecting eggs from the henhouse or digging post holes in one of the fields. 

He tossed memories of his time with Anna and Dmitri around, looking for the comfort those thoughts always brought. The steady influence of the seasons on every aspect of their lives, the frank, uncomplicated dealings with the people around him. No hidden alliances or shifting agendas, no checking the blood and eyes and necks of every person he came in contact with. 

A little impish voice piped up deep in his head that he could find something productive to do without racing eight thousand miles across the world to a wheat farm. That there were honest and forthright people in his life now and that there were no more green-blooded, oil-carrying, metal-ridden invaders to hunt and kill. 

But Mulder is here, Alex told the voice. He's here and he's dying and I don't want to see that. I want to be far away when it happens. Dana can handle it. 

A sudden grim picture came to him, of Dana and Will and a new grave, Dana comforting her son and letting no one comfort her. Alex knew that was how it would be. She would insist that she was fine, she would tell Maggie or Charlie or whoever offered to come home with her that she was fine. 

And then she would go home alone and stew and brood, her face steely, refusing to let tears build up, let alone escape. 

Alex could see it so clearly, it startled him. He remembered how resolute and cold-how very Scully-Dana had been when he'd first seen her again at Townsend. Nothing like the Dana he had bedded a week ago, who was open and touchable, her smile warm, her eyes riddled with expression whether she was teasing him or writhing in pleasure beneath him. 

It occurred to him suddenly that he was being a coward, leaving Dana to take on the burden of Mulder's eventual death alone. She would have her family, she would have Will, but only Alex could share the pain of lost love with her. Alex squirmed mentally at the thought. He'd been accused of many things in his life but no one had ever been able to call him a coward. 

He decided in an instant that he wasn't going to start chickening out now, especially not about Mulder, the dearest thing in his life, and not with Dana and Will. 

He spun around and grabbed the phone from the coffee table, dialing Dana's number without any hesitation at all, eager, in fact, to tell her what he had resolved. 

He wasn't quite prepared to hear Walter Skinner's voice answering Dana's phone and for a brief, furious moment, he wondered if she was sleeping with the bastard. 

"Is Dana there?" Alex asked, pitching a bit of Yankee nasal into his voice to throw Walter off. 

"No, I'm sorry, she's out for the evening. Can I take a message for her?" 

"No, thank you," Alex answered and hung up. Walter Skinner was the one relic from his past that could still throw a quick chill over him. 

He tossed the phone onto the couch, feeling unexpectedly disappointed that Dana wasn't home to hear his change of plans. He had just begun making a can of soup when the doorbell chimed. His heart thumped oddly when he went to the door and saw a flash of bright hair beneath the porch light. 

He pulled the door open and there she was, smiling the warm smile he'd been thinking about earlier. He stepped aside to let her in and, after closing the door, went to give her what he had planned to be a brief, friendly kiss on the cheek. 

It stayed friendly for less than two seconds and then they were devouring each other again, tongues frantically pushing, hands grasping and twisting in hair and shirts, bodies pressing tighter and tighter together. 

"Dammit," Dana gasped explosively, tearing herself away from his mouth. "I... just wanted to talk to you...see if...you had decided..." 

"Shhh," he breathed, pulling their lips close again. "Talk later. I missed you." He kissed her again and again and she kissed him back and soon they were back in his bedroom, clothes falling wherever and skin welcomed back. 

A horrible scorching smell permeated their satiated bubble fifteen minutes later. 

"Shit," Alex exclaimed, jumping from the bed and racing down the hall. A smoke alarm began its ghastly ringing and Dana heard clattering metal and running water coming from the kitchen. She rolled lazily out of bed, picked up Alex's robe and slipped it on, sniffing it appreciatively as she knotted the belt. 

He was scrubbing tomato soup off the stove where it had boiled over. The charred pot was sizzling in the sink and the smell of burnt tomatoes still hung in the kitchen air. 

Without looking up from his task, he muttered disgustedly, "I forgot the damned soup. I just put it on when the doorbell rang and...well, no soup for dinner tonight." 

She giggled lightly and apologized. "Sorry. I hadn't planned that. If it's any consolation." 

He laughed as he finished cleaning up the mess. "I called your place earlier. What's Skinner doing there?" 

"Watching Will for me while I came over here to talk to you." 

"Talk, huh?" he asked slyly. 

"Well, like I said, that was my plan. And I do want to talk to you." 

"So talk," he said, taking her hand and leading her into the family room. They sat close together, her arms wrapped around his waist. 

"The first thing I need to do is ask if you have any plans made yet," she said. She tucked her head on his shoulder so he couldn't see the tension in her face while she waited for his answer. 

He kissed the top of her head. "Funny you should ask. That's why I wanted to talk to you tonight." He took a deep breath, then plunged ahead. "I don't think I'm going to go back to Anna's after all." 

Her head popped off his shoulder and she stared at him as he went on. 

"You're right, I can try to make a life for myself here. Not the one I planned on twenty years ago, but..." he shrugged. "I can try. And I would hate to leave Will. And...and you, too." 

"You're going to stay?" she asked cautiously. 

"Yeah," he smiled at her shocked expression. "Is that okay with you?" 

She nodded, her eyes beginning to show something besides surprise. "What changed your mind?" 

He pulled her in, settling her against his side. "You. Will. Leaving the two of you to go through what's ahead with Fox. I thought maybe I was being a bit of a coward about it, running away and hiding." 

"You're not a coward, Alex. I know how tired of the emotional turmoil you are and if you did leave, I wouldn't blame you or think any less of you." 

"But you'd never do it, would you? And I can't have people saying Dana Scully was braver and tougher than me." He smiled self-deprecatingly. 

"Even though we both know I am," she teased, then stroked his face soothingly. "Are you sure, Alex? About staying here?" 

"I'm sure," he answered, turning into her touch. They sat peacefully for a few moments, then Alex opened his eyes. "What else do you want to talk about?" 

She didn't answer for a time, then a resolved expression settled on her face and she dropped her hands into her lap. 

"I wanted to talk to you about, well, the sort of thing that happened again tonight. That seems to keep happening whenever we're in the same room." 

He made an encouraging sound and she looked at him with earnest and revealing eyes. 

"I don't know what's happening between us, Alex. It's ...I thought it was about Mulder, you know? That we were...I guess channeling our feelings for him. But it's not, not anymore." 

Her eyes dropped back to her hands and he could barely hear her voice when she continued. "I've come to care for you so much, Alex. I don't know what we're going to do about it, but...well, I wanted you to know. You've come to mean so much to me." 

He gathered her close, his heart hammering at her words. "What do you want to do about it?" he asked quietly. 

She nestled in deeper, finally crawling into his lap and kissing his neck. "I want to see if I can be part of this life you're going to put together." 

"I'd like that very much. But," and he tilted her face up to meet his, "you need to be sure you're ready to let go of the past. No," he shook his head when she opened her mouth to speak. "Not tonight, it's too soon. But sometime soon we have to go over the old ground and make sure it's not going to tripwire on us. Okay?" 

"Okay," she said, resuming her cozy position. They sat peacefully for a long time, the quiet in the room comfortable and friendly. Dana reveled in the absence of her usual guarded feelings, blissfully free of worries that Alex would think she was weak or soft because of her confession. 

The muted beep of one of their watches marked 10:00 and Dana lifted her head with a tired sigh. 

"I've got an early class tomorrow," she said. "We haven't set any ground rules yet, but will you come home with me? I've missed having a warm body to wake up with." 

Alex looked down at her and she could see him thinking it over. At last he said, his voice full of regret, "I'd love to, but, with Skinner at the house..." he shuddered dramatically and she giggled for a moment. "Not a good idea, Dana." 

"I'll sneak you in my bedroom window, how about that? We can play high school cheerleader and the horny quarterback." 

Alex laughed until he was gasping for breath. "Fine, you tramp," he said when he could finally speak. "Go get dressed and I'll meet you there. I'll hide in the bushes till he leaves." 

Alex came out of Mulder's room with a light step, nearly colliding with an orderly who was standing near the door. He apologized cheerfully, then sauntered toward the elevator, waving to the nurses at their station. He and Dana were hot gossip at Townsend now that everyone knew about their romance and Alex was getting used to the inquisitive, interested glances from many of the staff who knew both of them. 

Hell, he thought as he waited for the elevator, he was still amazed himself. They had talked, as Alex had known they would have to, and he was floored by Dana's acceptance of the things he'd done, things that still set his conscience screaming. Even her sister's death, while Alex looked on, was forgiven. 

"Before it was anyone else's 'fault'" she had said, using audible quotations, "it was mine for joining the FBI in the first place. She wouldn't have died if I'd gone into medicine. She wouldn't have died if I'd turned down the X-Files assignment. She wouldn't have died if I hadn't gone back to the X-Files. It happened and it hurt like hell, but I'm not going to let that one loss discolour the rest of my life." 

Alex had simply stared speechlessly at her for a minute. There were days when he couldn't forgive himself for Melissa Scully's death, so arbitrary and wasteful was it. He felt his admiration for Dana's strength and compassion go up a dozen notches more. 

He found himself grinning foolishly at the sappy thoughts in his lovesick head, too wrapped up in them to notice the vicious smile of triumph on the face of the orderly still standing outside Mulder's room. 

* * *

When Alex and Dana went to visit Fox a few days later, Alex stopped cold at the threshold of the room, a puzzled scowl on his face, a sudden elusive response to something pinging in his brain. He scanned the room with his well-trained quick efficiency. Some fragment of memory was whispering 'threat' to him and he tried to find it while Dana went to kiss Fox hello. She turned back, wondering why he was standing motionless in the doorway. She swallowed her question at the sight of his frown, his eyes flitting around and around the room. 

"What's wrong?" 

A few more flits and he shrugged. "Nothing, I guess. Something...felt off for a minute." He came to stand next to her, leaning in to kiss Fox as well, but stopping cold again. He picked up the hand that should have worn three gold bands but was bare instead. 

"Dana, look." 

She did and spit out a curse at sight of the naked finger. She snatched up the call button, ringing it in angry repetition until a nurse came scurrying into the room. 

"Dr. Scully? Is something wrong?" It was Margaret and normally Dana would have felt quite friendly toward her. 

"Fox had three rings on his right hand the last time we were here," she snapped. "Did someone remove them for some reason?" 

"Not that I know of," Margaret answered. "I'll certainly check, though." 

She left the room and Dana turned back to Alex. His frown was back in place and he was stirring the bed coverings, looking for the rings but with an expression that clearly said he didn't expect to find them. He knelt down to peer beneath the bed, then started rifling the drawers of the night table. 

Dana paced up and down the room, still angry and now feeling disillusioned as well. Petty theft at Townsend was practically unheard of and this-pilfering something right off a patient's body-left a very bad taste in her mouth. 

Margaret came back into the room with the staff supervisor. He confirmed that none of the staff had any reason to remove Mulder's rings and had Dana and Alex fill out a stack of papers reporting the theft and describing what was taken. 

As they headed to the parking lot and got into Alex's car, Dana said, "I guess that's what set your alarms off, huh?" 

"Maybe," he answered curtly, his black mood not inviting any more discussion. 

* * *

The sound of a ringing cell phone worked its way into Dana's dream and it took her a few moments to realize she was really hearing it. She rolled over, glancing at the clock, and saw that it was almost 7:00. A small tendril of fear spread through her chest as she thought that phone calls this early in the morning were usually bad news. 

She reached for the phone on her nightstand, then realized she was hearing Alex's cell. She nudged him and whispered, "Alex, your phone's ringing, babe." 

"Mmm, 'kay." He picked it up as he got out of bed and clicked in the call. 

"Hello...? Yeah, this is him...Who...." He had been heading for the bedroom door, not wanting to keep Dana awake with his talking, but whatever the caller was saying rooted him to the spot. He listened intently for a few minutes, his jaw clenching the longer the caller talked. When he finally responded, his voice was tight and edgy. 

"I see. Has her doctor seen her?....What did ...uh, huh. So how long has she been like this?" He walked stiffly back to the bed and sat down. "Did the unit officer say anything else? Was she violent?" He nodded once, wiping his hand across his forehead and through his hair. 

"Okay. No, it's no problem. I can be on the next flight out. Yeah, let her know I'm coming...yeah, I know. ..right, I understand. Okay, have Dr. Aschfield call me when she gets in. This number, yeah... I guess for now just try to keep her calm. Try not to overmedicate her, though. I want to be able to talk to her when I get there...I don't know, it's a two hour flight. It depends on when I can get out...okay, thank you. I'll be there as soon as I can." 

He ended the call and tossed his phone back on the nightstand. Dana scooted across the bed and knelt behind him, wrapping her arms around him tightly. He leaned back against her and sighed, then said "That was Messito, Elena's hospital. She's having some kind of breakdown, she's been asking for me for two days." 

"You're going out to Cincinnati then?" she said against his ear. 

"Right now," he answered with a sigh. He got up, squeezing her arms before setting them from him gently. He went to her closet and pulled out his duffel bag, peered inside and decided he had enough spare socks and shorts to get him to Ohio. 

He turned, ready to grab his shaving kit from the bathroom and almost fell over Dana as she reached into the closet and pulled out her own overnight bag. 

"I'll call my mom, she can be here in half an hour." 

She didn't wait for him to answer, just began tossing her own necessities into her bag while he floundered for a response. She looked up, seeing his perplexed expression and set the bag on the bed, then crossed her arms and gave him a cool stare. 

"You don't think I'd let you go alone, do you?" 

"Will..." 

"He'll be fine with my mom. It's Friday, I'll get a teaching assistant to cover my one lecture and I can come back Sunday. I don't want you to be alone in something like this." 

He felt an odd bubble of emotion boil up in his stomach at her words and realized it was comfort and relief. He wasn't alone, he'd forgotten that and the grin that blossomed on his face made Dana feel like the most powerful creature on the earth. 

He grabbed her in a ferocious embrace, then pulled away and shook his finger in her smiling face in mock warning. "One of these days you're going to wise up and dump my ass, but I'm damned glad you're here right now." 

Maggie pulled into the driveway forty-five minutes later, full of concern for Alex's sister and with a bag full of doughnuts for Will. Dana had woken him to say goodbye and the sight of Grandma with goodies lessened the surprise of his mother's hurried departure. He kissed both Dana and Alex before they left and so did Maggie, pulling Alex close for a quick hug. 

"I'll say a prayer for her, Alex. You two be safe." 

"Thanks, Maggie. I appreciate this." 

"I'm glad I could help. It stinks to have to go through stuff like this alone. Go on, don't miss your flight." 

Dana came back for one last hug. "Thanks so much, Mom. We'll call when we get in." 

Maggie and Will stayed on the porch waving until the Saab sped away. 

Their flight landed at the airport in Kentucky. Dana's indignation that Cincinnati's airport was not actually in Ohio amused Alex to no end and she was secretly pleased at unclouding his grim face for a moment. 

Soon enough, though, they were speeding up the freeway toward Cincinnati proper and Alex's face shadowed more and more the closer they got to their destination. They bypassed the congested center of the city, skirting through the suburbs until they reached the non-descript brown brick building that had sheltered Elena Kryshenkov for the last twenty-two years. 

Alex was stoic and silent as they made their way through the security checkpoint and parked the rented Pontiac. Dana gripped his hand supportively and held on until they reached the facility director's office. A short, tubby woman in her fifties ushered them into a conference room and shook hands with both of them. 

"I'm happy to meet you in the flesh, Mr. Kryshenkov," she said in a disarmingly low, mellow voice. "I'm Dr. Patricia Aschfield," she introduced herself to Dana. 

"Dr. Dana Scully," she answered. "I'm a friend of Alex's and a medical doctor." 

"Nice to meet you, too. Well, here are Elena's current records." The director pushed a thick manila folder at Alex and Dana nudged her chair closer to read with him. 

"Her last session with her therapist was on Tuesday afternoon. Normal behavior patterns, normal activity level. Everything was consistent up until early Wednesday morning. The unit officer heard screaming around 4:30 and went to investigate. Elena was hysterical, saying there was a ghost in her room and that 'he' was going to hurt her again." 

"He?" Alex asked sharply. "'He' as in ..." 

"Well, we assumed she meant your father. That's been the universal component in her delusion, that her father might come back and take her away. But it's always been the possibility that frightened her. This time, she believed she had actually seen him, that he had been in her room." 

"Had anyone been in her room?" 

"No, the guard on duty was sure of that." 

"Okay, what did the guard do when he got there?" 

"He put the ward in lock-down and paged the physician on duty, who called Elena's psychiatrist." 

Alex flipped through a few pages. "Dr. Leonard. Can I talk to him?" 

"Of course. I've asked him to join us in a few minutes. I wanted a chance to fill you in on the basics before we started discussing your sister's treatment." 

"The woman I spoke with this morning said she's been asking for me. Is that still going on?" 

"Yes, which is quite unusual. She understands perfectly that you live out of state. Of course, we're used to her talking about you, you're quite a hero to her." The doctor gave him a warm smile and Alex felt the oddest combination of pleased pride and bitter guilt wash through him. Dana's hand creeping into his was an extraordinary comfort. 

"So, she started asking for me...?" he prompted. 

"Yes, sorry. Ah...yesterday evening, just at lights out. She'd been agitated all day and Dr. Leonard and I had discussed re-evaluating her medication regimen. She began screaming again, the same things about a ghost and 'him' hurting her. The guard brought her back to one of the rooms the therapists use and called Dr. Leonard and I back in. Elena insisted that we call you because you could stop 'him.' Every effort we made to soothe her only seemed to agitate her more. She fixated on the idea that if you were here, you would make whatever was frightening her stop." 

A soft knock at the door interrupted her and a grey, curly-haired head popped in. 

"You ready for me yet?" 

"Yes, Vince, please." She waved the man in and he took a seat across from Dana and Alex. 

Dr. Aschfield introduced him. "Dr. Vince Leonard, this is Alex Kryshenkov and Dr. Dana Scully. Alex is Elena's guardian and older brother. Dr. Scully is a friend of the family." 

"Pleased to meet you, Mr. Kryshenkov, Dr. Scully. Has Patty brought you up to speed on Elena's situation?" 

"Some of it," Alex said. "I'd like to hear what you have to say about it." 

"Of course. I've been Elena's primary mental health provider for two years. I'm thoroughly familiar with what constitutes 'normal' behavior for her. Not normal by outside standards, but what Elena's day-to-day behaviors and responses are likely to be. The red flag that's going up with this situation is the sudden onset of the crises behaviors-the hysteria and violent reactions..." 

"Wait a minute-- I was told she wasn't behaving violently." 

"That may have been true earlier, but this morning she attempted to assault the orderly bringing her breakfast tray to her." 

Alex grimaced. "What else is going on?" 

"Well, Elena's delusional repertoire has been consistent since she came here. The universal components are her father and the...harm he caused her and her sister and the circumstances of her sister's death. How Elena incorporates those elements may vary and there are many days when she easily recognizes the delusions for what they are." 

Alex tried to keep the impatience out of his face and Dana squeezed his hand beneath the table again. She spoke as calmly as possible. "Dr. Leonard, you said there were red flags going up. Could you explain that, please?" 

"Sure. Sorry about the shop talk, but it's important that you understand what is normal for Elena so you can understand that what we're seeing right now is not normal." 

"Okay," Alex said sharply. "I get that. So what's got everybody all worked up?" 

"Alex," Dana whispered in his ear. "Try to be patient, okay? He's trying to help her." 

"As I said before, the suddenness of the problem is a key concern. Elena has been stable for a long time now. Until the other day. So that's a major indicator that something is wrong." 

"The really worrying thing, however, is the sudden expansion of her delusional repertoire...the 'cast of characters', so to speak, that populates her psychotic breaks. She's added a new character, a ghost that comes in and out of her room. Her interpretation of your father has changed from concern that he might come here to conviction that she saw him and that he is definitely coming back to hurt her. Am I making everything clear?" 

"Yeah," Alex said dispiritedly. "You're saying she's getting worse." 

"Well, she's definitely experiencing an increase in indicative behaviors. Meaning she's...well she's acting crazier than she normally does, if you'll excuse the layman's language. But keep in mind it's the suddenness of the onset that has us concerned more so than the type of behavior. Quick changes usually indicate something organic rather than an increase in the underlying psychosis. We've done a physical battery and nothing out of the ordinary has come up. I'd like to explore changing her medications-it's possible that there's a chemical glitch somewhere. I'm hoping your presence will at least calm her down." 

"Can we see her now?" Alex asked, moving to stand up. 

"If you'd like. She might be a little groggy from the Ativan we gave her after the incident with the orderly this morning. You can visit for a few minutes and then we'll talk some more." 

He guided them through corridor after corridor until he stopped in front of one of the rooms. He knocked on the glass window and held up a pass card and moments later the door swung open. A guard stepped out of the room, closing the door behind her. Vince asked her some quiet questions, looking through the window once or twice while they talked. Finally, he waved Alex closer. 

"She's awake. You can go in to see her for a few minutes." 

"Thanks," Alex said, looking in the room for Elena. 

She was sitting on her bed, cross-legged, her head bowed. Her hair was still dark and wavy and she was wrapping and unwrapping a strand of it around a finger. Alex quickly scanned the room, taking in the changes since he'd last been there so long ago. Stacks of books on her desk, no surprise there. Piles of CD's and cassette tapes on top of the stereo he'd bought for her a few years back. 

He twisted the door handle and she looked up immediately. He smiled and waved at her, beginning to push the door open, when she flew off the bed and flung herself against the door, slamming it closed again. 

"Get out!" she screamed through the glass. Alex stepped back from the door as Elena's face twisted in terror and she let out a wrenching shriek. She pounded the window and kicked violently at the door, all the while screaming at Alex to go away and to stop hurting her. 

His face was white when he tore his eyes from the heartbreaking sight and turned away. Dana took him in her arms immediately and he spoke over her head to Dr. Leonard. 

"Is this what she's been like?" 

Dr. Leonard sighed heavily and pulled a pen from his pocket, scribbling rapid notes in Elena's file. "I'm afraid so. I had thought seeing you would have had..." 

"Oh, god," Dana whispered. "Alex, it's seeing you that's upsetting her. She thinks you're Mikhail." 

He lurched out of her embrace. "What?" 

"You look so much like him, Alex. I saw the pictures at Anna's. In fact, you probably look like the image of Mikhail that's most frightening to her. You're at the age he was when all the abuse took place." 

Once Alex had berated Dana for her trademark cool detachment when discussing Mulder's injuries. Now he was thankful for her strong and steady calm while he floundered around in bewildered pain. When Elena began crying brokenly for him, he thought he would collapse in tears on the ground, badass reputation or no. 

Dr. Leonard and Dana were talking, but Alex wasn't listening to them. Elena had stopped beating against the door and when he took a wary look in the window, he saw that she was crouched on the floor between the desk and the wall, the desk chair pulled in front of her. She was still crying softly, and Alex could still make out his name. 

"Can you talk to her?" Alex asked the doctor, heedless of interrupting their discussion. "Tell her it's me?" 

"I can," Vince agreed gently. "But it might not make any difference." 

"I understand. Just...please tell her I'm here." 

Vince tapped on the window until Elena looked up. Seeing only the doctor, her haggard, horrified expression eased somewhat. 

"Elena, can I come in and talk to you? Would that be all right?" 

"No," she barked hoarsely. "He's out there." 

"Elena, Mikhail isn't here. He's dead, you know that." 

"He's here! I saw him. He was standing there, looking in the window again." 

"Elena, that isn't Mikhail. Mikhail is dead. He's been dead for years." Vince rattled the door handle loudly, giving Elena plenty of warning before easing the door partly open. "I'm going to come in now, Elena. No one else is coming in with me, okay?" 

He stepped into the room slowly, leaving the door open. Elena cowered further back in her little den and Vince knelt near her, being sure to leave her a way out, his bulky body graceful as he lowered himself. 

"Are you feeling a little calmer now?" he asked. Alex and Dana didn't hear an answer, but Elena must have given one because Vince answered, "Okay, take a few more deep breaths. I think that will help. Do you want some water or juice?" 

"No," came a thin whisper. "I want Alex." 

"I know," Vince said, scooting an inch or two closer and peering between the slats of the chair shielding the woman. "Elena, we called Alex this morning, just like we said we would." 

There was a long pause and then another whisper. "I want him. I need him to..." Her voice ended in a whimper. 

"I know you do. You've been asking for him and he's here now." 

"Where? Is he coming to help me?" 

Dana felt Alex tense up at the words, felt how much he wanted to burst through the door and start slaying dragons. She stroked his back gently until she felt his knotted muscles relax a fraction. 

"I'm sure he'll help you as much as he can. We need to talk some more, though, okay? About Alex." 

"Is he okay?" 

Vince smiled. "Yes, he's fine. But before you see him you need to understand something about him. 

Vince moved in closer, resting his elbows on the seat of the chair. His voice was the soothing verbal equivalent of lithium as he said, "Do you remember telling me how much you look like your mother now, more than when you first came here?" 

They didn't hear her answer. Vince reached in to stroke the slippered foot that was in his reach and said, "That's something that's happened with Alex, Elena. He looks a lot like your father..." Another harsh whimper came from beneath the desk and Vince looked sympathetic, but determined. 

"I know, Elena, that's a scary thought to have. Alex doesn't want to frighten you, so we need to find a way for you to see him and know that he's Alex, not Mikhail." 

"Alex is here?" came a mousy, hopeful voice. 

"Yes, he is." 

"Where?" 

"He's out in the hall. That was him before, opening the door." 

There was a scuffle and Elena's tear-streaked face peeked out from beneath the desk. Alex stood statue-still in the doorway, ready to move out of her sight if she became hysterical again. 

She stared at him, her face pasty and sweat-slick, her teeth fastened to a fingernail. Her dark eyes swept up and down him and Alex wished for a moment he could rip his face off. 

Elena turned away, facing Vince once more. "Alex is skinny. He's a bean pole and he doesn't have any gray in his hair. That's not him." 

"He's older than the last time you saw him. People change." 

"He looks like..." she shook her head brutally. 

Alex felt Dana's arm around his waist, tugging him out of earshot of the pair in the room. 

"Don't you have any birth marks or scars that would convince her?" she hissed softly. "God knows you have plenty of scars." 

"Nothing she would recognize," he grimaced. 

"Well, what about one of those things in the hokey movies? Some memory only the two of you have or something only she knows about." 

"I don't know." He began pacing the narrow hallway, trying to focus, but he couldn't stop seeing Elena's restless movements, her finger twisting her hair, the animal-like cowering in a corner. The picture crystallized in his head for a moment, of Elena's busy fingers, playing with her curls and tugging at her ear... 

Alex froze, forehead creasing with concentration and his hand moved up to tug at his own ear. He turned back to Dana and, without a word, pulled her hair aside and looked at her ear. She almost always wore small gold hoops, in her usual simple and sophisticated style. Alex smiled at the sight of the little ring and grabbed Dana's hand, pulling her back to the door of Elena's room. 

"I do know something," he said with a short-lived smile. 

Elena and Vince were still talking quietly. She had come a bit further out from under the desk, only to retreat at the sound of Alex and Dana's approach. 

"Elena," Alex called softly. "I know you don't really want to look at me right now, but can you try for just a minute? I want to show you something." 

Vince, still soothing, cajoled her into peering from her hiding place. 

Alex pulled Dana in front of him and tucked her hair behind her ear again. "I'm not going to say much, Elena. I just want you to watch and remember the first time you saw this, okay?" 

He unfastened one of Dana's gold earrings and pulled it out of its hole, then looked up to make sure Elena's eyes were on him. He held up the piece of jewelry, then pulled his own left earlobe a little before working the earring into the hole that was still open. He clipped it shut, then turned his head so the hoop was plainly visible to the woman in the room. 

He flicked at it once or twice, then said with a smile, "Do you remember when I had this done?" 

Elena stared entranced at the little bit of shining metal in his ear. She touched her own in mimicry-it was empty, but his actions obviously struck a chord with her. She came out from under the desk slowly, still transfixed as Alex toyed with the earring. 

"JC Penney," she said suddenly, taking them all by surprise at the sound of her voice, still guttural from crying. 

Alex's face brightened. "Yeah, JC Penney. I took you, you wanted to have your ears pierced for your birthday. And you saw the gun they used and chickened out." 

"I didn't chicken out," she said with a sudden burst of spirit. 

Vince raised an impressed eyebrow at Alex, but stayed silent. Elena moved toward the door an inch at a time, her eyes still scouring Alex's face and frame, desperate to believe this was really him. 

"Only when I said I would do it first. And even after I did, you almost didn't go through with it." 

"I hate loud noises and that thing was right by my ear." She was only a handful of steps from the door now and she began to stand up slowly, as if Alex was the one who would startle and shy away. 

She scrutinized him from the closer position, finally close enough to touch him. She reached for the earring first, then leaned in even closer to examine every pore of his face. 

"You're different," she whispered uneasily. "You ...you look like him...like..." she swallowed. "...Mikhail." 

"I know," he said, careful not to move. "I wish I didn't. I don't want to scare you." 

"You're not a bean pole anymore." 

He smiled slowly and she returned it with a very small one of her own. "I know. I turned forty and ...flop. Gravity won." 

"You're really here, right? I'm not being...you know," and she waved a hand as if she was shooing away an insect. 

Alex laughed and said, "Not right now. You wanted me and here I am. I told you I'd always come if you needed me, didn't I?" 

The smile lost its hesitance and sparkled across her face. She flung her arms around his neck and held on tight, crying silently as Alex rocked her gently, whispering soothing words against her black curls. 

Vince and Dana felt very unnecessary as Elena and Alex talked. The dinner summons had come and gone during the crisis and Vince suggested quietly that he and Dana go to the kitchen to drum up something for all of them. They excused themselves and Alex and Elena barely noticed, peppering each other with questions and reminiscences. 

Finally, Alex pushed the conversation towards her recently panicky behavior. 

"So, do you want to tell me what's been going on the last couple days?" he asked gently. 

Elena let out a brittle laugh. "You won't believe me. I hardly believe me." 

"Try me, Elle. You wanted me to help you-I have to know what's going on if I'm going to do that." 

They had been perched on her bed, but now Elena stood up and began making an agitated circle around the room as she talked. 

"I saw Mikhail. He was standing right outside my door, just looking at me." 

"When? Wednesday morning?" 

"Yeah. I woke up, I...I had a Lizzie dream." She looked at him apologetically. "And when I saw him standing there, I thought I was still asleep. He came in the room and I wanted to wake up so bad, I started screaming. That always works, but he was still there." 

The speed of Elena's pacing increased as she talked. "I kept screaming and he...he said 'Get Alex' and walked out of the room. And then a guard came in my room..." She shrugged her shoulders slightly and her mouth worked over another fingernail. 

"What about the next time?" Alex asked, his eyes following her nervous path around the room. 

"The next time..." Elena laughed a bit shrilly. "There were about twenty next times. I saw him in the hall on my way to lunch. He didn't say anything to me, he just looked at me. And for two days I kept seeing him in different places. It was like he was following me around. I even went outside and he was there. And then at lights out last night..." 

Alex could see the fear tightening Elena's face and he stood up to pull her into his comforting embrace. 

She lay her head on his shoulder and let out a weary sigh. "At lights out, I was scared he'd come in my room again. I didn't want to go to sleep, so I listened to a book on tape for a while. And I saw an orderly go by my door-the shadow on the wall spooked me and I put the light back on and then...he was just there, standing in the doorway again. We stared at each other for the longest time, and then he said that I needed to get you. He said you would take care of me." 

"Elly, did anyone else see him? All the times you saw him around the hospital?" 

She shook her head almost imperceptibly. "I don't know. I don't think so. The last time, he would have had to walk right past the guard and he said he didn't see anyone." 

She clung tighter to his neck and whispered, her voice shaking, "I'm scared, Alex. What if he's really here?" 

"He's not," Alex answered firmly. "I told you, Elly, he's dead. I made sure of it." 

"Then I'm going crazy again," she said, her body sagging against him in defeat. 

"Shh, Elle, we'll figure it out." He pressed a kiss into her tangled curls and sat them down on her bed once more. "Can you tell me more about what you saw? Did he say anything else?" 

"No, both times he spoke he said that I should get you or call you, I can't remember which." 

"Okay, did he look any different from before? Older or...was there any particular expression on his face?" 

"No, his face was...it didn't have any look on it." 

"Was he...I don't know, what was he wearing?" 

Elena looked puzzled and Alex laughed. "I'm reaching, I know. But was there anything about his appearance that was different from what Mikhail would look like?" 

"Well, he always had on hospital stuff, but I figured that was a disguise." 

Alex's attention caught on that. "Hospital stuff? Like what?" 

"Scrubs and sometimes a lab coat. One time I saw him pushing one of the meal carts." 

Alex nodded thoughtfully, trying to keep his face calm, but Elly's words sent a pang of sorrow through him. If she saw Mikhail's face in so many different places, she must have lost some of her hard-won ground against insanity. 

"Okay, that's enough for now, kiddo. When Dana and Vince come back with dinner, we'll eat and then I want you to go to sleep. I'll make plans to stay here tonight." 

"Here in my room?" she asked hopefully. Alex smiled, albeit with a touch of helpless sorrow in it, and took her hand in his. 

"If that's what you want. I won't move, promise." He crossed his heart and Elena laughed merrily, her anxiety melting in the protective warmth of her brother's presence. Another sad twinge hit him at the thought that she still believed in him so much. 

He held her close again, bringing an ethereal smile to her face while he rocked her and tears stung his tightly closed eyes as he felt a never-healed scab tear away from a very old wound. 

They stayed together like that for a long time, Alex rocking and Elena smiling. She finally pulled away from him and stepped back to say something when her face paled and her eyes widened in fear. She was looking over his shoulder and Alex whirled to see what had frozen her. 

The hair on the back of his neck stood up when he saw himself standing outside the door, an exultant sneer creasing the familiar face. 

"Alex," Elena whimpered, clutching his arm. He could feel her quaking and shoved his own jangling fear aside. 

"It's okay, he won't hurt you," he said loudly and, to his own ears, remarkably calmly. 

"No," said the doppelganger. "Not her. But you, Krycek, I will kill." 

* * *

Dana's first promising impression of Vince Leonard had increased to actively liking the man and they talked animatedly about his work as they made their way back to Elena's room. She was so engrossed in their conversation she didn't notice the man standing outside the room until they were halfway down the hall. And when she did notice him, she thought it was Alex until her mind registered the scrubs the man was wearing. 

She called down the hall to him, asking him why he'd changed his clothes. The man looked at her, first startled and then with malevolent disdain, then turned and ran round the corner. 

A low wail came from inside the room and Dana and Vince ran the rest of the way to the door. Vince took one look inside the room, spotted Alex, and took off after the other man. Dana could hear him snapping orders into his two-way radio as he veered around the corner. 

Alex stood near the desk, a sobbing and incoherent Elena cradled in his arms. He made useless shushing noises and Dana couldn't miss how pale and clammy his face was. He met Dana's eyes and said, "You saw him, too?" 

"Yes," she said shortly. "He ran when he saw us." 

"Where's Dr. Leonard?" he asked, still trying to soothe Elena. 

"He followed ...whoever it was. I heard him order a lockdown on the unit. Are you okay?" 

He let out one morbid laugh, but didn't answer her beyond shaking his head and beginning another soft litany of reassurances for Elena. 

A handful of minutes passed before she calmed enough to allow Alex to set her feet on the ground. She refused to move from his side and, when a clatter of alarms sounded out, she jumped and clutched his arm again. 

"Shh, it's the lockdown," Alex said softly. 

"Alex," Dana said, "Let's head up to the administration area. I want to talk to a security officer, to see if we can figure this out." 

"Yeah," he agreed and gently worked Elena's panicked grip loose from his sleeve. "Come on, Elly. We're going to see some people upstairs." 

"No, Alex, please don't leave," she cried. 

"I'm not, kiddo. I promise. But I'm trying to help you and I can't do that down here. Okay? Will you come with me? We'll go to Vince's office or maybe Dr. Aschfield's." 

"Okay," she sniffled, clinging to Alex's hand as he led her from the room. 

* * *

Vince had them escorted to a conference room near the director's office. Dana asked for copies of the security tapes from Elena's unit not only for that evening, but for the two other times Mikhail's twin had appeared at the woman's door. She and Alex found four different images of the man on the tapes, each time dressed in hospital scrubs. 

Alex felt a conflicting swirl of relief and dread. Without saying the word 'ghost' to himself, he had been secretly wondering if the man wouldn't appear on the tapes. Despite his repeated brushes with the supernatural, Alex still found some things horribly creepy and the idea of his father's spook, haunting his sister, was bone-chilling. 

But if it wasn't a ghost, it was still something inexplicable and unnerving. He and Dana focused on the taped images, talking in muted tones, their FBI training slipping back on like well-worn shoes. 

"Watch him scan the camera," Dana observed clinically. "He knows it's there, he knows how to time for the path switch." 

"Right. We've got him in profile and in rear-view. No facing shots." 

"Still, even the profile is enough to see the resemblance. He looks exactly like you." 

Alex snorted painfully. "So I put out an APB on myself? That's really fucking helpful." He dumped the video remote control on the table and shoved his chair away in disgust. "All this tells us is that he's here somewhere. Why haven't they found him yet?" 

"It's only been about fifteen minutes since the lockdown," Dana soothed. "He can't hide forever." 

"He's been hiding since Wednesday morning at least," Alex said angrily. He picked up the remote again and began scanning through the tapes from Thursday evening once more. Dana leaned against the table, nudging her thigh against his arm and giving him a sweet, comforting smile. 

He smiled back briefly and said, "Your mom was right, by the way. This would have really sucked if I was by myself." 

Dana kissed his head and said, "She's always right. Just don't tell her I said so." 

They exchanged chummy smiles once more before turning their attention back to the screen. A few frames later, Dana's attention perked up. 

"Wait a second. Rewind it," she said. 

Alex threw an inquisitive look at her, but did what she asked. 

"Pause there. See that?" Dana leaned closer to the screen and tapped the image. Mikhail's double was walking away from the camera, turning a corner just as a guard came around it in answer to Elena's cries. 

Alex stared at the image, seeing what she saw. "Why doesn't the guard stop him?" 

"Exactly," Dana said. "He's running to Elena's room because she's screaming, but he goes past this guy like he's invisible." 

"No, he knows he's there," Alex replied. "Look here." He advanced the tape a frame at a time and he and Dana watched as the guard and Mikhail's double exchanged brief waves. 

"Vince," Dana called the man's attention to them. "Do you know who this guard is?" 

Vince came to look at the screen, hunching over for a moment, then straightening up. "That's Paul Garrity. He's a housing unit supervisor." 

"Can we talk to him?" 

"I don't know if he's on tonight. Let me check." 

Vince left the office and Elena wandered over to look at the screen and listen to Dana and Alex analyze and contemplate. Her eye was repeatedly drawn more to the physical intimacy between them, however, at how Dana's hand lingered on Alex's shoulder and how her brother leaned his head against the redhead's hip. It hadn't occurred to her until that instant that maybe Alex, her brave, strong protector, needed someone to lean on once in a while, too. 

There was a soft tap at the door and Elena jumped, moving quickly to put Alex between her and the door. 

"Dr. Leonard?" a voice questioned from the hall outside. "The security manager said you wanted to see me." 

Dana went to the door and opened it. The guard from the tape stood there and Dana invited him in. 

"Officer...Garrity, is it?" The man nodded and took her offered hand. Alex rolled a chair toward him in invitation. 

"Dr. Leonard said there were some questions about an unauthorized person on my unit?" Garrity's inflection made a question of the statement. 

"Yeah," Alex said. He swiveled the TV screen so Garrity could see it, frozen once more at the image of the officer and Mikhail's twin passing each other at the corner. "This is security footage from Thursday evening. You responded to Elena's outburst, right? The report says you were first on the scene." 

"Yeah, I was. I had just finished bed check at lights out when I heard her screaming." 

"So you came to see what the problem was?" 

Garrity looked puzzled. "Sure. That's my job, right? She said there was someone outside her room and I sent the unit into lockdown till I made sure there wasn't anybody around who shouldn't be." 

Alex pointed to the second image on the screen. "What about this guy? Did you ask him why he was there?" 

The officer's puzzled look took on an irritated cast. "Why wouldn't he be? He was on duty that night." 

Dana's eyebrow went up and Alex frowned at the man. "Wait a minute. This is an employee?" 

"Yeah. He's an orderly. His name's Dan Tessmar." 

"When was he hired?" Dana asked. 

"Hell if I know." The irritation was taking over, but Officer Garrity answered anyway. "He was here when I started about three years ago." 

Alex and Dana sat silently, trying to make this newly presented fact fit into the picture. Alex gave a disgruntled noise, then abandoned the first line of questioning. 

"Okay, let me ask you something else." He rewound the tape to just prior to Mikhail's appearance. "Here comes Dan Tessmar. He stands outside Elena's room for about a minute, then he says something and walks off. She started screaming about three seconds later. Why doesn't he turn around to see what the problem was? Why does he just keep walking?" 

Paul Garrity leaned closer to the TV screen, his forehead wrinkling until, by the time Mikhail turned away and began walking down the hall, the man looked like a bewildered shar-pei. 

"Rewind it again," he said brusquely. Alex complied and the three of them watched the scene again. When Mikhail was out of the picture, Garrity was shaking his head vigorously. His frown deepened and the irritation was gone from his expression, leaving only wild befuddlement. 

"That can't be right. That's... not Dan Tessmar." He leaned in even closer, examining the time and date stamps on the tape frame by frame. "There has to be a cut in here somewhere." 

"A cut in the tape?" Alex asked skeptically. 

"Yes, dammit! That's not Tessmar, not standing at her door. There have to be frames missing from the tape, where this guy disappears and Tessmar comes out of another room or something." 

They moved in even closer, noses almost pressed to the screen, and advanced frame by frame through Mikhail's entrance, his pose outside Elena's door and his exit around the far corner. Garrity was white as paper by the time they'd viewed the tape the fourth time. 

"I saw Dan Tessmar," he gritted out. "I know him, he doesn't look anything like that other guy." 

Alex sat back finally and shut off the TV. "And you haven't seen the other guy anywhere around?" he asked neutrally. 

Garrity gave him a considering look. "You mean besides right now? He looks a hell of a lot like you, doesn't he?" 

"Yes, he does. But if you haven't seen him in the hospital anywhere, then we'll have to look for him somewhere else." 

"Alex," Dana said, confused at his apparent dismissal of the situation. He silenced her with a quick shake of his head. 

"I don't think we need to keep Officer Garrity any longer. Thanks for your help." Alex picked up a random file from the tabletop and began flipping through the pages. Garrity stood up, looking uncertainly from Dana to Alex. 

"If you have any other questions..." he said diffidently and Alex nodded without looking up from his reading. 

"Sure. If anything else comes up we'll let you know. Thanks." 

With a last baffled look, the officer left the room and Dana turned back to Alex. 

"'We'll have to look somewhere else?'" she demanded angrily. "What the hell was that?" 

"Come here. I want to show you something." He turned the TV back on and rewound the tape once again. He fast-forwarded through to where Mikhail turned away from the camera, then began the frame-by-frame movement again. 

"Watch his hair. At the crown of his head." 

Dana stood with her arms crossed, impatient questions radiating from her posture. "What am I looking for?" she asked when he paused the tape just before Garrity's appearance. 

"Look closely. Right here." Alex's finger rested on the back of Mikhail's head, then, as the frame advanced, moved carefully down as an insignificant amount of hair appeared to slip down the man's head. "See it now? The hair thins at the crown through these four frames." 

She frowned, leaning onto the table to peer closely at the screen once more. They watched the change over and over until, with a weary sigh, Alex set the controller down and sat back in his chair. 

Still leaning on the table, Dana turned to face Alex. "Do you have a theory you'd like to share with the class, Mr. Kryshenkov?" 

He gave her a tired smile. "Not one I like." 

"Well..." 

He sighed again. "The man I saw earlier said two things that rattled me. He said, verbatim, that he was going to kill me. And he called me 'Krycek.' And to be honest, it's the Krycek more than the death threat that gets to me. There are very few people left who know that name." He glanced over to where Elena had drifted off to sleep on the couch. 

Alex looked at her tenderly, then turned to look at Dana. He thought longingly for a moment about the life he had wanted to make with her, then said good-bye to a world where she wasn't afraid of him. And introduced fear and danger back into their world. 

"It's a shapeshifter, Dana." 

The sound of Alex clicking the door's lock shook Dana out of her shock. He sat down beside her again, his face concerned. 

"You okay?" he asked gently. 

"I'm fine." 

A twisted smile hit him at the automatic, infuriating response. "Fine is the last thing you are, Dana." 

She turned her head slowly to face him and her voice, in her ears, sounded miles away. "I thought they were gone." 

"Me, too. We scoured this planet for them. I could have sworn we got every last one. But it's the obvious answer. If it wanted to draw me out, this was the perfect plan-going after my sister." 

He rubbed at the back of his head, trying to ward off the crowded sensation of an overabundance of thoughts. Foremost in his mind was the need to protect Elena and Dana and to that end his eyes roamed over the office, looking for weapons. 

He moved to Vince's desk and began rifling the drawers, giving a satisfied grunt when he pulled out a dagger-style letter opener. He caught Dana's eye and shrugged in resignation. 

He kept searching and, finding one of the drawers locked, unfolded a paper clip and picked it open. He sucked in a relieved breath at the sight of a Glock 17, two spare clips and a tranquilizer gun. 

Dana watched him prime the guns and shove one into the back of his jeans, tucking the other into his jacket's inner pocket. She knew she was seeing the return of Krycek and when Alex turned to face her, she wasn't surprised that his expression was detached and cold, everything he'd left behind in the last year. 

"We need to get out of here," he said dispassionately. "I'm not sitting around waiting for him to come back." 

He went to the couch and shook Elena gently. She stirred and her face brightened immediately at the sight of him. 

"Come on, get up. We're leaving," he said. 

"Where are we going?" 

"Back to my hotel," he said, wincing at how quickly the lie came out. 

"Okay. What should I bring?" 

"Nothing. You can sleep in your scrubs. Come on." 

"I need to get a pass from Dr. Aschfield's office," she said and Alex wanted to scream his impatience at her. He took a giant breath through his nose and let it out slowly, then plastered a warm smile on his face. 

"We'll take care of it on the way out. Let's go, okay?" 

"Okay," she said, a cheery smile on her face that scraped Alex's nerves raw. 

He led her to the door and opened it, first checking the hallway for any passersby, then stepping out and hurrying Elena along, letting Dana move ahead of them. 

They had barely made it twenty feet when they heard Vince Leonard's voice behind them. Alex tensed instantly, but kept walking, slowing his pace enough to allay suspicions but not enough to let the man catch up without running. And if he started running, Alex's response would be swift and brutal. 

"Elena, where are you off to?" the doctor asked. "Are you ready to go back to your room now?" 

Elena stopped and turned. "No, I'm going to stay at Alex's hotel tonight." 

Alex cursed softly as he pulled unobtrusively on her arm. He watched Vince Leonard come closer, his calm voice saying, "I'm afraid that's out of the question, Elena. You're on unit restriction, remember?" 

"It would just be for tonight," she answered. 

"I can't change the rules for you. But your brother can stay with you. Right in your room if you like." 

Alex didn't answer. He had seen a minute smear of blood on the sleeve of the doctor's lab coat and he didn't need any further convincing that the thing in front of him wasn't Vince Leonard. 

He began moving backwards, tipping his arm and letting the stiletto fall out of his sleeve. He flipped it back to Dana, taking the gun out of his waistband and targeting Leonard's forehead as he pulled it around. The hunter smiled when he saw the weapon trained on him. 

"Have you forgotten so much already, Krycek? That won't do you any good." The hunter stepped forward and Alex moved back, pulling Elena along with him and ignoring her frightened questions 

"Dana, do you remember how this works?" he asked without taking his eyes off the creature. 

His admiration for her went up a dozen more notches when she answered coolly, "Back of the neck and twist, right?" 

"Good girl," he said, and his smile was as cold as the hunter's voice. 

"Would you risk your precious sister, Krycek? Shoot me or cut me, she isn't immune. She'll die before I do." 

The hunter leapt at them. Elena shrieked and twisted wildly away from him, crying out for Alex at the same time. Alex shoved her as hard as he could, sending her into the wall and insinuating himself between her and the hunter. 

He swiped at Alex like a cat, laying open a path of scratches on Alex's arm that immediately began to seep blood. Alex swung the Glock against his head, but the blow didn't faze the creature. He caught Alex's arm as it connected and pulled the gun from his hand. 

"You have something I want," it sneered, then its tongue flicked out, picking up the blood trailing down Alex's wrist. Its other hand reached to touch Alex's head and Alex tried to twist out of its grip until he felt an odd mental numbness sweep over him. It lasted only a moment, then the hunter flung him away, sending him crashing into the wall and nearly on top of Elena. 

Alex shook himself to throw off both the muzzy feeling in his brain and the rattling his body had taken. Everything cleared and he heard the harsh sound of the hunter's laugh. 

"You mated him! That's why the power was there." The thing approached the siblings and Alex pushed Elena behind him once more. He also pushed aside his awareness of her shivering and crying. The hunter stood over them, its look of ice-cold contempt ill-suited to Vince Leonard's genial face. 

"You humans are so very entertaining. When the traveler held you, you hated Mulder. You thought he was a ..." it frowned in concentration. "'a self-absorbed prick.' You wanted to beat him the way he beat you and the traveler wouldn't permit it. And then he became your mate. You are the weakest creatures, slaves to every stray emotion that blows your way." 

Alex stayed low against the wall, shielding Elena. Dana stood behind the hunter, clutching her weapon, waiting for a signal from Alex and trying not to shake. 

"What do you want?" Alex demanded. 

"You have the traveler's traces in your body still. I need them to call it so I can leave here." 

"Be my guest," Alex invited scornfully. "Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out." 

The hunter smiled again and leaned over Alex. "They are in your blood, Krycek. In your cells. When I take them, you will die." 

"Oh," Alex said a bit stupidly. 

"And I would kill you anyway, for all my kind you destroyed. And for leaving me on this foul world all this time." 

"Hey, no one invited you," Alex rejoined heatedly, trying to preoccupy the hunter with old history so Dana could find an opportunity to plunge the stiletto into its neck. 

"You killed the last soldier that could send me back. I had to stay here, all my comrades gone or dead-most by your hand or Mulder's. It will be the greatest vengeance to take from you to go home and to kill you to do it. Get up." 

The creature hauled Alex and Elena from the floor. Elena, still shivering but quiet in her shock, clung to Alex's waist frantically and he gave her a quick squeeze, then shrugged her off gently. 

"Listen, you don't need Elena or Dana..." he said, but the creature cut him off with a nasty leer. 

"They will make sure you behave. Your new mate and your beloved sister-all I need is Mulder and you'll do anything I ask, won't you? Walk. And tell Dana to put her weapon away. She will only harm your sister if she tries to use it." 

* * *

Alex walked mechanically through the hallways, his mind racing along once-familiar paths-how to kill it, where its weak spots were, what it could be bribed or threatened with. It wanted to go home-Alex had a sudden hysterical ET flashback-and it needed him to do it. 

Okay, work with that, he decided, but don't rule out severing its skanky green neck. He started considering ideas for protecting Elena from exposure to the hunter's toxic blood along with all the other thoughts spinning in his head. 

Dana had tucked the letter opener ostentatiously in her back pocket where Alex could grab it if a chance came their way. She didn't turn to look at him and Elena, simply marched ahead of them as if this were business as usual. His mind reflexively recorded the way she had read him ever since he'd slipped the opener to her and a detached part of him reveled in their synchrony. 

The hunter turned down a service corridor that ended at a fire door. He pulled Vince's radio out of a pocket while keeping a tight grip on Alex, turning the radio on and ordering that the lockdown be lifted. Sudden footsteps sounded behind them and the hunter whirled. 

"Vince?" It was Patty Aschfield and a uniformed officer. "What are you doing here? Did you just give the all-clear?" 

"Yes. The man isn't here." 

"Well, let's wait for the security manager's report before lifting the lockdown, like usual." She spoke briskly into her own radio, cancelling the hunter's orders. 

Alex felt it tense up and he knew that it wouldn't take much more bureaucratic crap before the thing lost its patience and all hell broke loose. 

"Dr. Aschfield," he said calmly. "I'd like to leave now. I'm going to take Elena with me to my hotel. She'll be safe there and she'll feel calmer." 

"Alex, I'm afraid that's not possible. Your sister attacked an employee today, she's on unit restriction." 

"Enough," the hunter suddenly growled. "Open the doors. Now." 

Patty puffed up indignantly and stepped closer to the hunter. "Now just a minute, Vince..." was as far as she got. 

The hunter pulled the gun he'd taken from Alex and leveled it at Patty's heart. The guard with her immediately drew his sidearm and fixed it on the hunter's chest. 

"Don't shoot!" Alex hollered, struggling against the hunter's hold, trying to push Elena farther behind him. 

"Unlock the doors," the hunter ordered. 

Patty was professional and calm and Alex thought remotely that this probably wasn't the first time she'd had a gun pointed at her. "I can't unlock anything during a lockdown, Vince, you know that. Everything's controlled from the security desk." 

"Patty," Dana's strained voice came from behind the hunter. "Please just do what he says." 

Dana was full of an impotent rage. She had a clear shot-the hunter's neck lay smooth and naked before her, she could almost see the blade splitting the skin. But the hallway was narrow-it would fill with noxious fumes before anyone would have a chance at getting away. She and Alex were immune to the blood's acidic effects, but Patty, Elena and the guard would be dead in less than a minute. 

"Dana, are you and Alex trying to get Elena out of here? If that's what you want, please don't involve Vince, you'll ruin his career. Just tell me what you want." 

"That's not Vince," Alex finally snapped. 

The hunter backhanded Alex sharply, then turned back to Patty without any change in his blank expression. "This is the last time I ask. Unlock that door. Call the desk and have it done. Right now." 

"Vince..." 

A roar of gunfire exploded and the guard next to Patty dropped to the ground, his chest torn open and an eternal look of shock on his face. 

Elena gave up her soft whimpers and howled like an animal until the hunter slapped her as hard as he had Alex. She crumpled to the floor and Alex twisted like a dervish trying to get to her. Patty's face was white as she looked from the dying guard to Elena's rapidly bruising cheek, then to what she believed was her friend and colleague. 

"Vince," she gasped, horrified. "Vince..." 

"Not Vince," the hunter growled and he shifted, becoming Alex again. The gun in his hand never wavered as he changed, aiming now at Patty's head. "Open the door and we will leave. No one else will be hurt." 

Patty flipped her radio on with shocky, robotic movements and gave the order to lift the lockdown in the administrative corridors. She denied that there had been shots fired, simply repeating the command to open the doors. 

A muffled clunk from the end of the hallway told them the lock had released and the hunter chuckled as he tucked the Glock back into the waistband of the scrubs he wore. 

"Thank you, Dr. Aschfield. You've been very helpful." He turned away, shoving Alex into Dana and ordering them to move to the door. He lifted Elena, still stunned from the blow he'd given her and followed Alex and Dana. 

"Wait," Patty whispered. "Where's Vince? Is he all right?" 

The hunter smiled without answering and Alex turned back to face her. 

"Vince is dead, Patty," he told her. "He's in a laundry room or a supply closet somewhere." 

"Move, Krycek." The hunter took Alex's arm and pushed him forward once more, turning his back to Patty. Who immediately fell back on a lifelong career in corrections to rush him from behind, aiming a blow at the back of his knees and knocking him off balance. His grip on Elena loosened enough for Alex to grab her and push her to Dana. 

"Go!" he hollered and Dana went, throwing the letter opener to Alex before slamming out the fire door. Alarms sounded immediately in answer to the door opening. 

The hunter never hit the floor, regaining his feet and turning to lift Patty by the throat and squeeze. Alex scooped up the long blade and pulled the tranquilizer gun from his jacket pocket at the same time. He aimed the blade at the creature's neck but its movement as it shook Patty was enough to screw up his strike, instead sending a deep gouge across its shoulder. 

The blow was enough to draw the hunter's attention from Patty to Alex and it heaved the woman into the wall before turning back to him, the green acid already hissing through the clothes it wore. Alex shot him point blank, hitting the hunter's chest with enough force to make it stagger back a handful of steps. 

"Patty, close your eyes and hold your breath," he hollered over the alarms and the bellowed rage of the hunter. 

He grabbed her hand and dragged her, praying that whatever was in the tranquilizer would have an effect on the hunter. His own eyes began to sting and he could hear Patty gagging and wheezing as he rushed through the fire door and out into the grounds. He quickly spied Dana and Elena and slung Patty over his shoulder before racing in their direction. 

It wasn't long before he heard the door crash open and chanced a quick look back to see the hunter stumbling toward them. He pushed himself to run faster, catching up to the other women and beginning to hunt for the car he and Dana had rented. Patty's slurring, grated voice said in his ear, "Employee lot. Mine's closer. Blue Saturn." 

"Where, Patty?" Alex muttered, scanning the lines of parked cars. 

"North fence. Executive..." her voice faded out and she slumped bonelessly over Alex's shoulder. 

Dana spotted it, parked in the director's space. She fumbled in Patty's pants pockets until she found the keys and hit the lock button. They climbed in, Alex laying Patty none too gently in the rear seat with Elena, still almost immobile with shock. He glared at the bruise on her cheek as he threw the car in gear and whipped backwards out of the space. 

The hunter was still coming. He had shifted to another form in hope that the drug in his system would dissipate, but, while leaving him conscious, the tranquilizer affected his coordination badly. He still staggered and could only watch in outrage as the blue car tore through the lot. 

It fired the gun at them, emptying the clip into the side of the Saturn and blowing out the passenger window, showering Dana with broken glass and nicking Alex's forearm as he drove. 

They used Patty's pass card to open the lot's gate and Alex headed straight for the nearest freeway ramp. Dana hung over the back seat, checking on Elena and the doctor. 

"How are they?" Alex asked tersely. 

"Dr. Aschfield's reacting to the retrovirus. She needs oxygen and an anti-viral course." 

"There's a hospital two exits from here. We can leave her there." 

"I have to tell them how to treat her, Alex. Without the right anti-virals she won't make it." 

"Write it down. We're unloading her and going." 

"Fine," Dana snapped, knowing she was dealing with Krycek in full-blown survival mode. 

"How's Elena?" 

"Shocky, but she'll be okay as long as we keep her warm and calm." 

He grunted a response and drove faster. Patty hung between awake and unconscious, able to answer some of Dana's questions and ask some of her own. By the time they reached their exit and Alex turned toward the small suburban hospital, Dana had convinced Patty to keep Alex and Elena out of the police investigation that was sure to be in full swing back at the prison hospital. 

"You know it wasn't Alex that killed the guard, or Elena. But we can't prove it." 

"Wasn't Vince either," Patty rasped weakly. 

"I know, Patty. But while the police focus on Vince, Alex and I can search for the hunter. And Elena will be safer with us." 

Patty nodded reluctantly, then drifted off again, her eyes red and weeping from the acid and from her grief at Vince's death. 

Dana had scribbled two pages of instructions for treating Patty. They pulled into the hospital's ambulance bay and Alex worked quickly to settle the woman into a wheelchair near the emergency room door. He thanked her in a whisper, tucked Dana's notes into her hand and jumped back into her car, making sure the tires squealed loudly as they pulled away. 

"We need another car," he said as he merged back onto the freeway. 

"We're not stealing one," Dana protested immediately and Alex looked at her in surprise. 

"Who said we were?" 

Dana felt a quick flush of shame at her presumption. "I ...I wasn't sure how resourceful we were going to be." 

His eyes grew colder as they settled on the road once more. "Thanks for the vote of confidence. We'll pick something up at one of the car rentals at the airport. And lest you worry about poor Dr. Aschfield, I'll call the hospital and let her know where her car is." 

"Alex, I'm sorry." 

"Forget it. We have other things to talk about. Call your mom, tell her not to let Will out of her sight. And get Charlie...no, get Skinner over there. Tell him what's going on, set up a password, tell him to stay with Maggie and Will. Have him post somebody at Townsend, in Fox's room." 

Dana's face turned white as the implications of his orders sank in. "Why would the hunter go after Will?" 

"He knows everything that's in my head. He used Elena to draw me out and now he'll use whoever else he can. If he goes by who's most important to me, he'll be after Fox, then Will, then, if he's desperate enough, he might go after your mom." 

"Christ, Alex, we have to fly back! He could get there ahead of us." 

"I don't have ID for Elena, there's no way to get her on a plane. And I'm not sure if anyone else is looking for us, after what happened back there. I can't take the chance that you'll be recognized and detained. We'll be back home in ten hours if we push straight through." 

Dana felt all her old fears surge to new life as she called Skinner, then her mother. Maggie's fright echoed over the phone and Dana pushed her own raw fear aside to reassure the other woman. 

Alex watched the coldness seep back into her expression and felt another strong twinge of regret at the return of Krycek and Scully. 

She hung up the phone then said, "How did he know about Elena?" 

Alex answered without taking his eyes from the road. "The ....oil slicks, what he called the travelers, are communal. Shared consciousness. They absorb their hosts' memories and spread them through the community. All the colonists carry a traveler at one time or another, they're sort of symbiotic. It's hard to explain. But I got jumped by a traveler in Hong Kong, years ago." 

"And the hunter picked up your memories from the traveler you carried?" 

"Yeah. The hunters aren't communal, but once you pick up one traveler you know everything the colony knows. So damn near any hunter would have known about her. But I don't know how the thing knew I was around. It had to pick up a trace of my DNA to sense the traveler and I don't know how that could be." 

"It probably saw you somewhere." 

"No, they don't recognize by sight. They shift too much to rely on visual ID. The hunters ID by smell and taste and they tag the travelers by taste, too. Somehow it got hold of spit or hair or something and knew exactly who I was. And when the bastard took my blood back at the hospital, it got a taste of the oil and that gave it access to everything that's in my head now." 

"How can that be? You aren't carrying the oil anymore, are you?" 

"No, but it leaves...traces in the host's DNA. That way they get an instant update on former hosts. Sort of like a tracking collar on an animal." He gave her a sideways grimace. "That's pretty much what we were to them." 

"Why does the hunter need the oil to leave?" 

"Hell if I know. He was probably just being sadistic. They hated me and Mulder the way he and I hated Spender." 

"Did you kill a lot of them?" 

"Every damned one I could find." He said it with a grim relish and Dana held back a shiver at the resurgence of Krycek's ruthlessness. 

They both fell silent until they reached the airport, Dana fighting to stay composed while inwardly panicking at the thought of the creature coming near Will or Mulder and Alex reviewing every means of destroying the hunter he'd ever seen or heard of. 

* * *

While Dana rented a car, Alex and Elena found an ATM and he withdrew the maximum allowed from three of his bank accounts. Elena watched in surprise as he pocketed three thousand dollars. 

"Are you rich, Alex?" she asked childishly. 

"Sort of," he answered, thinking of his parents' life insurance and the abandoned assets of the Consortium. "I have enough for what we need and that's what counts, right?" 

"Where are we going?" 

"Back to Maryland, where I live now. I need to take care of a few things." 

"Are you going to find it?" 

"I'm going to try." 

He pulled Patty's car into the long-term parking garage and helped Elena out of the back seat. They leaned against the car while he called Dana's cell, directing her to where they waited. Elena eyed him as he talked to her and, when he hung up, asked, "Is she one of your girlfriends?" 

He gave her a quirky look. "One of my girlfriends? How many do you think I have?" 

"You always had girls around. Do you love her?" 

"I'm getting there." He laughed sharply and said, "If you knew how bizarre that was..." 

"Why is it bizarre?" 

He shrugged. "Just bad blood between us. Lots of ancient history. We need to find you some different clothes, you stick out a little," he said, turning the subject easily. He reached into Patty's car and pulled out one of the spare lab coats piled on the floor. 

Elena slipped it on and looked down at the pink scrubs with her ID number and the Ohio Corrections stamp on the breast and smiled at him. "It'll be nice to wear something new. I sometimes get to wear jeans unless I'm on restriction." 

"Still a shitkicker are you?" 

"Not as much. People just piss me off sometimes and..." she made a violent fist and smiled a little dangerously this time. 

"You always did hit first and think last." 

"Yeah, well, you were a disgusting little boy who teased me till I cried. You deserved every bloody nose I gave you." 

They laughed together, Alex reveling in the warmth of family, even screwed-up, crazy family. He'd missed it so much, the references that only a sibling would understand, the shared reminiscences. He tried not to let in wistful thoughts of what his life would have been like if he'd never lost the two of them. 

Dana pulled up a few minutes later, driving a ubiquitous Ford. Alex let her drive, directing her toward a local Wal-Mart. He kept close watch while the two women selected clothes for Elena and picked up a few groceries to get them through the trip. 

It was nearing nine o'clock when they got back on the freeway, Alex driving now, Dana navigating and Elena sleeping in the back seat. The two of them didn't talk much, mostly about the best route home. Dana called Maggie, relaxing somewhat when Walter answered the phone and assured her that no one had been near the house all evening. 

"CNN had an interesting story earlier this evening," Walter offered just as Dana was getting ready to end their conversation. "There was a shooting at a federal prison in the Midwest." 

"Really?" she answered carefully. 

"Yes. A guard was killed by one of the staff doctors." 

"Anything else?" 

"No. No reports of escaped inmates or outsiders being involved. Just a random shooting I guess." 

"I guess. Thank you, Walter. Take care of Mom and Will for me." 

"Be careful, Dana." 

She ended the call and turned to Alex. "No one's looking for us. Walter says the story was on CNN. A doctor shot a guard, that's all." 

"Good. One less thing to worry about." 

* * *

Dana woke up to the sound of her phone ringing again. Walter had agreed to check in every hour and she glanced at her watch. 4:00 a.m. 

"Walter?" she answered, her sleepiness wiped away immediately. 

"Everything's fine," he assured her. "Will and your mom are sleeping. There's been nothing here or at Townsend." 

"Okay, thank you, Walter." 

"Any idea on when you'll be here?" 

"Just a minute." She covered the phone and asked Alex, "Where are we?" 

He glanced at her quickly. "Half an hour into Pennsylvania." 

"We're in Pennsylvania. We'll be there in another four hours." 

"I'll check in again. Take care." 

She ended the call and dumped the phone onto the seat between she and Alex. She studied his tense profile, the way his eyes flicked in a pattern from Elena's sleeping reflection in the rearview mirror to the highway, to the mirrors on either side of the car. The silence in the car felt uncomfortable and she said, completely inanely, "That was Walter." 

He didn't answer beyond an absent-minded nod and she turned to look out the window. It was dark and there wasn't anything much to offer in the way of scenery, anyway. 

Her mind flitted squirrel-like from wondering if Alex was still angry with her to brief, heartfelt prayers that Will was safe to replaying everything that had happened back at the hospital in Cincinnati. 

She didn't realize she was sighing and fidgeting, her mind agitating her body, until she felt Alex's hand steady her knee. 

"It's going to be okay. Stop fretting." 

"Sorry," she said softly. More silence and she watched his eyes follow the circuit again. He was blinking often and when she saw him wipe a finger over each eye, realized he was probably exhausted. 

"I can drive for a while if you want to sleep a little," she offered. 

He didn't look at her as he shook his head. "No, I won't be able to sleep, so you might as well." 

"Okay," she answered. "Let me know if you change your mind." 

"Yeah, maybe later." And his eyes kept roving, never settling anywhere for more than a few seconds, always reminding Dana that a threat was somewhere waiting for them. 

The next time she woke up, Elena and Alex were talking quietly. Alex's eyes were red from fatigue and Elena was leaning against the back of his seat, rubbing his shoulders and neck. 

The sun was up, shining directly in the window and she glanced at the clock. It was 6:30-they hadn't stopped since a quick trip to a restroom back in West Virginia. Her stomach growled and caught the attention of Alex and Elena. 

"Hey, sleepyhead," he said tenderly. 

"Hey. Where are we?" 

"Just east of Hagerstown. You need to stop?" 

She nodded, wiping grit from her eyes and wishing for coffee. The next exit boasted a gas station and a McDonald's and Alex swung off the highway. They refilled the car, everyone used the bathroom and Dana and Alex were sucking down tepid McDonald's coffee, Alex bitching all the while. 

He let Dana drive finally, still too wired to sleep but needing to rest his eyes, parchment-dry and burning from the constant staring and searching. He and Elena continued talking while he lay his head back and closed his aching eyes. Elena started rubbing his shoulders again and Alex rolled his neck, the resulting popping and cracking noises making her laugh. 

"You are getting old, Stick," she declared. "Listen to you creak." 

"I know," Alex sighed ruefully. "And don't call me that." 

"I guess I can't anymore anyway, you pudgy old man," Elena teased and Alex reached over his shoulder to tug a lock of her long hair. 

Dana laughed with him when Elena smacked his hand, glad that he had this brief interlude of play with the sister he loved so much. 

"Why Stick?" she asked, trying to keep the playful spirit alive before they had to deal with the nightmare again. 

Alex rolled his eyes while Elena laughed again and said, "He was so skinny when he was a boy, all arms and legs like knobbly twigs. And when he was 13, he grew six inches in six months and didn't gain any weight. So Lizzie and I called him Stick-that's what he looked like. And you're not pudgy," she assured her brother, leaning in to kiss his cheek. "I'm just teasing you. You're still the handsomest man around." 

"Thank you, Tippy," he replied with exaggerated grace. 

Elena cuffed the back of his head. "Don't you call me that, Aleksandr." 

"Hey, fair's fair." 

Dana listened to the good-natured teasing most of the way through Maryland. Alex never mentioned the hunter or what they would face when they got home and Elena didn't ask anymore questions. Dana decided she wouldn't shove reality at them until they reached Bethesda and had to determine what to do next. 

Her decision was voided when Alex's cell rang. She knew it was the hunter as soon as Alex answered. His face tensed immediately and his voice came out in an angry clip. 

"I hear it," he growled. "What do you want?...another twenty minutes... I'll be there, I just have to stop...No! You don't need them...God dammit, you want me, fine, leave them out of it..." 

He listened for another minute, then clicked off the call and slammed the phone onto the dashboard. "Go straight to Townsend. He's in Mulder's room, I heard him talking to Skinner's hand-picked agents." 

Dana didn't waste breath defending Walter. She reached for Alex's hand and he let her squeeze it for a moment before shaking himself loose, pressing the heels of his hands into his bloodshot eyes as he relayed the bounty hunter's threat. 

"He's giving me half an hour to show up in Mulder's room. With you and Elena." He grinned morbidly. "He wants all my weak spots in one place. I'm surprised he didn't ask me to pick up Will while he was at it." 

"That's not funny, Alex," Dana said, fear making her voice high and thin. 

"Sorry, just whistling in the dark." His grin was more genuine now, but faded quickly. "Listen, call Skinner and have him meet us at the hospital. I want somebody around who the bastard can't use against me and who knows what we're dealing with. Have your mom and Will go to Charlie's. They'll be fine there, that's not something in my head." 

She called the house immediately, talking first to Walter, then Maggie, then Will. The sound of her son's happy voice sent a flood of tears into her eyes and she sent up another quick prayer that he would be safe. When she ended the call, she set the phone down and put her hand back on the steering wheel, her face stoic, lips pursed, eyes bright with unshed tears. 

"All set?" he asked. 

She nodded, only the whitening skin of her fingers on the steering wheel betraying her fury and fright. 

* * *

They reached Townsend fifteen minutes later. Dana opened her door at once, but Alex's hand on her arm stopped her climbing out. He gave her the letter opener he'd used back at Elena's hospital and she took it, a brief look of disgusted resignation crossing her face before the impassive mask slipped back in place. 

"Do you have something you can use?" she asked calmly. 

"I'll grab something on the way up," he hedged and she didn't press for any more. 

Alex turned to face Elena, still sitting in the back seat and once more looking hopelessly fragile. "Elly, I know how hard all this is for you. But it's going to be okay, I promise. I'll take care of you, okay?" 

"Okay," she whispered blankly. She started chewing another fingernail and blinked like a watchful rabbit. 

He sent them upstairs ahead of him while he broke into an office and pilfered a security guard's sidearm. He met them in the lounge on the fifth floor and bid them wait while his mind looked at all the familiar nooks and crannies and evaluated them as threats and hiding places. 

He walked down the hallway to Mulder's room and found two men seated in chairs in the hallway. They stood and stopped Alex from entering until a deep voice from behind him. 

"Let him in." 

Alex spun around and saw Walter Skinner approaching with his usual confident, alpha-male stride. 

"Yes, sir," one of the agents said quickly and unlocked the door. 

Alex stared at the man, trying desperately to determine what or who it was as he followed him into the room, his hand creeping toward the weapons he'd collected. 

As soon as the door clicked shut behind them, Walter's face melted into the familiar visage of a Colonist, all broad eyes and narrow jaw. Alex fought down the panicky surge he'd always felt at the true appearance of the things. It gave a muted, oddly high-pitched excuse for a laugh before becoming Skinner again. 

"You're just in time, Krycek. Are your precious women here as well?" 

"They're down the hall. You don't need them, or him," he gestured to Mulder, still pale and still in the bed. "I'll help you leave. I want you out of here as much as you want to go. But I need to know that you're the only one left." 

Skinner's face scowled. "I've searched for years. They're all gone-dead or left for other places. The travelers are gone, too, and their hosts have died from the cancer. The only traces I've found have been from drones and I can't call with those." It eyed him curiously and said, "You don't have the cancer in you." 

Alex looked surprised. "Should I?" 

"Yes. All hosts have it, it makes tracking them easier. I thought you would be long dead. I hoped for it. But you have healing in your cells and the cancer can't grow in you. I didn't know this race had healers." 

Alex didn't answer, not willing to expose Elena and Anna's talent, and the hunter laughed at him. 

"Do you think I don't know about your sister and your aunt? How amazing that you have hope for anything left at all, after everything you've seen and done. You are remarkably resilient creatures, I give you that." 

It leaned into Alex's face. "It will be an honour to kill an enemy of your calibre, Krycek." 

* * *

Walter came out of the elevator and saw Dana sitting in the lounge, her arms wrapped comfortingly around a dark-haired, pale woman. 

"Where is it?" he demanded without preamble and Elena flinched and cowered against Dana's shoulder. 

"Shhh, it's okay. He's a friend. Aren't you?" She raised cold blue eyes to him and he nodded. 

"Yes, Mrs. Mulder, I'm a friend." 

Dana relaxed at the phrase they had agreed on. "This is Alex's sister, Elena. She's...she's a little unstable." 

"Small wonder," Walter said sniffily. 

"Not now, Walter." 

"Fine. Nice to meet you, Alex's sister. Now where is it?" 

"It told Alex to meet it in Mulder's room." 

Walter shook his head. "The agents won't let anyone in until I say otherwise. We've had the whole ward closed off." 

She pointed down the hall and said stonily, "Alex is in the room and your men are still sitting by the door. I guess we know who it's pretending to be right now, don't we?" 

"So what do we do? Sit here waiting?" 

"No. You call those agents and dismiss them, then we cut into the room and take it out before it can do anything to Alex or Mulder." 

"You don't think they'll wonder why I'm calling instead of opening the damn door?" 

"Do you have a better idea?" 

He stared at her for a moment, then rolled his eyes and pulled his radio from his pocket and beeped the men outside Mulder's room. He peered from the shadows of the lounge as he told them the threat to Mulder had been removed and they could leave. He felt a glimmer of disgusted anger at the way they simply stood up and left the area without questioning any of the oddities in protocol. 

"Okay, let's go," he said, all business as he pulled his sidearm from its holster and held it out to her. "I'll do the door and you cover me." 

She nodded. "If there's any discharge from its body, get yourself clear fast." 

They stepped into the hallway, but Walter felt a tug at his jacket and he turned around to see Elena. 

"I'm coming with you," she said in her throaty voice. "I don't want to stay here by myself." 

"I'm sorry Miss...Mrs.....this needs to be quick and it's probably going to be ugly. I don't want to put civilians at risk." 

"Please don't leave me out here alone. It might come back." 

"You'll be much safer staying here," Walter assured her, turning away again. Elena fell into step behind him and he stopped once more. She turned imploring brown eyes to him full of fear and brimming with wetness. 

"For God's sake," Dana snapped. "That thing is going to figure out the guards are gone. Let's move. Elena, stay out of the way. If the thing starts bleeding, hold your breath, cover your eyes and run like hell for the nearest exit." 

"Dana , I can't condone having a helpless..." he stopped talking at Dana's derisive snort. 

"Walter, she's been in prison for murder for the last twenty years. Helpless she's not." 

He looked at Elena skeptically and the dark-eyed woman flashed him an oddly familiar, dangerous grin. 

"I'll be okay as soon as I'm with Alex." 

He shrugged and turned back down the hallway, muttering that he should have expected as much from another Krycek. 

They reached Mulder's room and Dana got in position while Walter readied himself to force open the door. As soon as he heard the safety click off the weapon she held steady, he shot forward, shoulder-first and felt the door give almost immediately. 

He dropped to the ground and rolled aside so Dana could get a clear shot. He saw, peripherally, that the hunter still wore his face and that Krycek had ducked and rolled at the sound of his entrance. 

Dana squeezed off two rounds, one at the thing's head and one at its neck, hoping either shot would be enough to kill it. Time seemed to trickle as she watched green fluid bubble out of a gaping hole in its skull and she knew her head shot had hit. It looked like the other shot had missed and she lifted the gun to shoot again. 

She felt something tumble at her feet and flicked a momentary glance down before locking onto the creature again. Walter was scuttling toward the hallway, his eyes watering but not yet reddening. Elena reached down and dragged him through the door. 

"Dammit, Elena, get out of here," Alex bellowed. 

Walter stood up and he and Elena disappeared from the doorway. Alex sighed in a moment's relief, then leveled a sweeping kick at the hunter's knee, unsettling its balance but not bringing it down. It recovered in an instant and picked Alex up, sending him flying into an opposite wall, then turned to Dana. 

Its eyes were immediately drawn to the dagger-esque weapon she held in one hand and the automatic she had in the other. It smirked coldly and the expression was all the more unsettling for being on Walter's face. 

"Go ahead, Dana. Waste all your bullets, then see if you can get close enough to cut me before I rip your head off your shoulders." 

It came closer and she waited till it was at point-blank range before firing three more shots at it. It reeled back, then shook off the blows and slapped her, grabbing the letter opener from her hand and flinging it from the room. 

Dana fell to the floor, the gun clanking down beside her. It sneered at her dazed face as it kicked the gun away as well, then turned back to Alex. He was getting up slowly, bleeding from a gash in his head and cradling his left shoulder. 

"Come, Krycek. Play time is over." 

"Go to hell," Alex growled as he walked unsteadily to where Dana was trying to get to her feet. He helped her up, checking her for wounds beyond the split lip and bloody nose she was sporting. He held her close for a moment, wiping her face with his hand while she tried to look at his cut as well. 

"I'm fine, Alex," she said, then caught herself and gave him a watery, rueful smile. 

The creature laughed loudly as they huddled together like grooming apes. "I cannot believe you care for Krycek, Dana Scully. The first time I saw you, I thought Mulder was the only creature you cared for so deeply. And now look at you, clinging to this man. Fickle, fickle humans," it mocked. 

"What would you know about me and Mulder?" she asked angrily. 

"I know all about you and Mulder," it said with another smirk. It shifted suddenly and Dana felt a wave of fury sweep over her as its features coalesced into a face she knew and hated. 

"You did this to him? You bastard..." she threw herself against the creature's now-thin chest, trying to pummel at it with her fists as it shoved her away with another hearty laugh. 

Alex's anger flamed as well at the sight of a man he had last seen in a Virginia prison, a homeless heroin addict named Thomas Fielding. Fielding was serving a fifteen year sentence for senselessly attacking Fox Mulder, beating his head bloody with a brick. He'd been found a block away from Mulder's body, unconscious and naked despite the February cold, the gore-stained brick still in his hand. 

"I wanted Mulder dead," the hunter continued viciously. "But he didn't die and I couldn't get close enough in the hospital to finish him. Then I realized what kind of hell he was in and decided that would do as well. And now imagine how delighted I am to find that his pain is your pain, Krycek. There's a ....what's the word? Serendipity to it, don't you think? I only wish I had known you were still alive earlier, I would have come to watch you suffer." 

A wisp of curiosity broke through Alex's rage and he said, "How did you find me? After all this time?" 

"I wasn't looking for you. I assumed the cancer would have taken you by now. I came to stop Mulder from coming back. I kept watch on him and when Dana Scully ordered new tests, I was determined to finish him if he showed signs of coming awake." 

"You were working here?" Dana demanded angrily. 

"No, I simply came in to watch him from time to time. On days when I was feeling particularly vindictive I would watch for hours while he lay there, drooling and wetting himself. It was quite satisfying. In between times I searched for a traveler or at least a host left alive. I wanted to leave, even more than I wanted to see Mulder dead." 

"What about Alex? How does he come into it?" 

"I came one day and sensed healing energy in Mulder's body, too weak to wake him but enough that I pushed it away, just in case. I kept coming back to make sure the healing stayed weak, but I came one day and found it had strengthened almost beyond what I could stop. The smell of the traveler and its host was everywhere in the room. I found the source, in this..." It pulled a chain from around its neck and dangled it in front of Alex, jingling the three gold rings strung on it. 

Alex turned white with rage and grabbed wildly for the chain, but the hunter jerked it away with a teasing smirk. 

"You made this metal, Krycek. It reeks of your taint and it hums with your power. You are a very strong healer, did you know that? Stronger than some of my kind." 

The hunter leaned in close, its mouth pressed to Alex's ear despite his effort to flinch away. "It was working, though you didn't know it. Once you put the last ring on him, you broke through his last wall. It would have taken time, but he would have come back. Your precious Lisa, well and strong again. Know that, despair and die." 

Its intimate gesture gave Dana a moment to grab the gun she had dropped, not sure what she could accomplish with it, but feeling like it was better than nothing. When she looked at Alex and the hunter again, it had lifted Alex by the shirtfront and, as she watched in helpless anger, it swung him against the nearest wall and pinned him there effortlessly. 

"We have work to do, Krycek." It splayed one hand around Alex's skull. "I hope you don't mind staying conscious for this, though it's likely to be quite painful," it said with a nasty sneer. "Your brain has to keep firing in order to release the traces." 

Alex tried to jerk away from its touch, succeeding only in misplacing its fingers for a moment and making it angry enough to backhand him, then shove its arm against his throat. 

"Stay still, Krycek, or I'll strap you down like a lab rat." 

Alex looked over the thing's shoulder, at Dana still holding Walter's gun indecisively and realized he had one play left. He caught her eye and gave her the smile that, once upon a time, would have made her skin crawl. 

"Dana, put the knife down," he said mock-urgently, ignoring Dana's puzzled stare as she lowered the gun. The hunter kept his grip on Alex's neck, but turned to see what threat was behind him. 

Alex gestured to Dana to toss the weapon to him and she did, more puzzled then ever. She watched in horror as he caught it, smiled at her again, then swept the gun beneath his own chin. 

The hunter turned back at the click of the safety sliding off and froze at the sight of the gun poised to obliterate Alex's brain cavity, knowing a bullet would destroy its last chance to go home. 

"Surprise!" Alex crowed a bit maniacally. "You ready to make a deal now?" 

"There will be no deal, Krycek," it spat out, but it dropped its hand from his neck, careful not to move too quickly. Something like confused dismay came into Fielding's pale, fishy eyes. 

"Guess again. Get away from me." 

It took two steps backwards, never looking away from Alex's cold, determined eyes. Alex met Dana's appalled, tear-streaked face. He mouthed an apology to her, then turned to the hunter. 

"I propose... a trade. I'll let you pilfer all my cells so you can phone home. In return, you heal him." He nodded slightly toward Fox's immobile body curled up and still oblivious to the drama going on around him. 

"What?" Dana choked out in surprise. "Alex..." 

They ignored her, the hunter looking at Alex, curiosity narrowing its eyes. It didn't speak until Alex said insistently, "You can do it, can't you? All of you can heal." 

"I can. Is it worth that much to you?" 

Alex grinned a feral, crazy sort of smile. "It's a win-win situation. You go away and he comes back." 

"You would die for him?" 

More manic grinning and he said slyly, hoping Dana would get the horrible irony, "It's a far, far better thing I do than I have ever done." 

"That's not funny!" Dana cried out, her face twisting and full of pain. 

"In the grand scheme of things between you and I, it's funny as hell," he consoled her, then turned again to the hunter. "Do we have a deal?" 

The alien gave him a mock bow. "Despite having no honour of your own, I will swear by mine. Mulder in exchange for you. Put down the weapon." 

"No way. How do I know you'll do your thing once I'm dead?" 

"How do I know you'll willingly give yourself to me once Mulder is healed?" 

"I don't have much choice, do I? Consider it a dying man's last wish. Your kind honours that, don't they?" 

"In war we do." 

"I think I fought you bastards long enough to deserve a final request." He grimaced slightly, then said, "Please. Take care of him and then you can do whatever you want to me." 

The thing smirked again. "It is unbecoming for a fighter to beg." 

Alex shrugged. It looked closely at him, then went to Mulder's bedside, dragging Alex with his feet barely touching the ground. Still wearing Fielding's gaunt face, it laid one hand on Mulder's forehead, the palm pressing firmly between the blank eyes. A long moment passed and then it took its hand away. 

"Done. He's awake. Now..." 

It moved away from the bed, still half-carrying Alex. It pushed him to his knees and loomed over him, an unpleasant hunger in its eyes. The haphazard thought crossed Alex's mind that Fielding probably looked like that when he needed a fix. But then the hunter pressed both hands to Alex's skull and a nova of pain smashed through him. 

"Ah! Fuck!" he gasped before he could bite it back. He saw Dana flinch and step toward him. "Get out of here," he panted as the hunter's grip strengthened. 

"No, Alex!" Dana cried. "You bastard!" She came at the hunter with clenched fists, until the creature shifted again, letting Alex's features replace Thomas Fielding's. 

"It is a mark of respect to wear your enemy's face at his defeat and to make his death quick. I am giving Krycek more honour than he deserves. Go now, leave him to me." 

Its eyes bored into Alex's and he felt a burn begin behind them. Before another ten seconds passed, he knew intimately what it meant for one's blood to boil. He could almost feel each cell incinerating as the stain of the oil was expelled. 

The alien ran one hand through Alex's hair for a moment, then looked at it. Alex could see, through the red haze beginning to fill his visual field, that the creature's fingers were slick with blood and oil. 

Dana was crying openly for once, horrified and heartbroken at the sight of Alex's eyes, nose and mouth seeping oil and blood, his skin festooned with spatters of both and wretched gagging moans spilling from his throat. 

She didn't hear her sobs being echoed from the hallway. She only knew that a dark-haired whirlwind flew into the room and launched itself at the hunter. A pained bellow erupted, followed by a bubbling, hissing noise. The hunter collapsed on top of Alex, writhing as a wound at its neck spilled out noxious green fluid. 

Elena, still clutching the discarded letter-opener, kicked at the creature, trying to pry it off her brother. Dana pulled him from beneath the dying hunter and he tried once to struggle to his knees before collapsing beside the hunter's evaporating body. 

Elena screamed and threw herself over him, wrapping her arms around his bloody head as she tried to clear away the scummy coating. 

"Please don't be dead, please, Alex..." she pleaded as Dana pulled her off her brother. 

* * *

Alex felt a blessedly cool wetness on his face and tried to open his eyes. They wouldn't cooperate and, when he tried to raise his hand to rub them, found his arms clumsy and unresponsive as well. Panic flared in him and must have crossed his face because Dana's voice was at his ear in an instant. 

"Shh, it's okay. You're a mess, I'm trying to clean it off." She kept talking soothingly and the wet cloth came back again and again until he managed to peel one eye open. 

"Elena...?" he croaked. 

"She's fine, she's right across the room. Walter's with her, cleaning her up." 

"Clean...?" 

"She got a little messy, too." 

"What happened?" 

Dana laughed shakily, still wiping his face. "Your sister shares your resourcefulness, I guess. She killed it." 

Alex strained to open both eyes and sit up. Dana pushed him back down gently, saying, "You need to rest. You lost a bit of blood and you've got a couple burns from the...the acid or whatever it is." 

"Did Elena...the virus...is she okay?" 

"She's fine. She's better than she should be, considering her exposure to that stuff. She must be immune, something to do with the healing maybe." 

"It's gone?" 

"Yes. Nothing left but the usual scorch marks and puddle of goo. I'll clean it up before Walter reopens the ward." 

Elena appeared at Dana's side, her face worried and pale beneath the smears of blood and oil. "Alex? Are you all right?" 

"I'm okay. I'm worried about you, though. That stuff usually kills people." 

"I'm fine. My eyes were burning a little and my throat's a little bit sore, but I'm not sick." 

He shifted over and patted the sofa beside him, inviting her to sit down. "So, you're the hero of the day. What did you do?" 

She shrugged. "Back of the neck and twist, isn't that what you said?" 

He laughed weakly and took her hand. "You're a fast learner, aren't you?" 

Elena didn't answer his laugh. "It was like...like Mikhail was back, only this time it was you he was hurting and I couldn't stand it. I couldn't lose you, Stick. You're all I have left." 

She fell apart, then, dropping across his chest and weeping hard. He stroked her tangled black curls and held her tight. Dana motioned to Walter and they left the lounge, heading down to Mulder's room to clear away the signs of what had happened, leaving Alex and Elena alone. 

Dana and Walter stood in the doorway, the tang of acid in the room still noticeable though the puddle of freon-colored ooze was already crystallizing. Dana went to the bed to give Mulder a quick, thorough exam while Walter circled the scorched area with his investigator's eye and walk. He knelt down when a glint caught his eye and picked up the chain the hunter had teased Alex with. 

"Do you know what this is?" Walter asked, jingling the rings. 

Dana took them from him, smiling wistfully at what was left of months of anguished work and worry. The rings were intact, though the chain was scored heavily by the acid. She slipped them off the cheap metal and held them tight in her hand for a moment, then turned back to the bed and slid them onto Mulder's finger once more. 

"They're...nothing important," she said quietly. "Let's finish up here so we can head home." 

* * *

He didn't know he'd been in the dark and the quiet, so the sudden change to light and noise was painful and bewildering. A harsh brightness poured into his eyes and then a crash of falling metal echoed in his ears. His instinct was to cover his ears and curl away from the light but his limbs responded as sluggishly as if he were swimming through mud. Another instinct kicked in as panic swept his unwieldy body and his dry, disused throat struggled to push out a sound. 

"Dana..." 

* * *

By that evening, Mulder was awake and words like 'miracle' and 'mystery' were thick in the corridors of Townsend. He couldn't move much or talk, but he was aware, his eyes bright and full of questions. 

Maggie brought Will straight from Charlie's and the boy, seeing his father's vivid face, flung himself onto the bed, heedless of Dana's warnings to be careful. The next word Mulder tried to say was his son's name and Alex, standing silent in the hall, thought the sight of a joyful Fox Mulder was damn near worth all the work and worry of the last year. 

* * *

Alex was prowling around his house, trying to find something to occupy his mind and keep it from filling with melancholy thoughts. Elena was asleep in his spare bedroom, her face peaceful and girlish, and he kept coming back to stand at the door and watch her. 

After his clash with the hunter, he had felt like a truck had driven over him twice. Elena was still jumping and flinching at the passing of every person bustling in and out of Mulder's room and Walter Skinner was watching him hawkishly, making his nerves positively crawl. 

He'd stayed in the quiet corner of the lounge while the flurry of activity went on in Mulder's room. Countless people moved a vast assortment of equipment in and out of the room, Mulder himself was being wheeled up and down the hallway for test after test and in the thick of it, Dana tried to keep up with each new development. She would send a reassuring glance Alex's way whenever she passed, but they never had a moment to talk. 

Finally, unable to keep from weaving when he walked and tired of Skinner's glares, Alex took Elena home near midnight. Every cell of his body ached and he could feel traces of sticky grime still matting his hair. His sister fell asleep as soon as she lay down and he took a long shower, thinking he'd fall asleep as easily as she had. 

But now, here it was, almost two in the morning and he was shuffling through his house like a ghost. He had picked up and put down a half-dozen books and magazines. He'd opened the refrigerator over and over, as if new and suddenly appealing food would have appeared since his last peek. He'd run the TV gamut once, losing patience quickly with the bland reruns and garish infomercials. 

He finally wound up outside, sitting in the chilly night air, smoking endlessly and letting the depressing thoughts loose, centered around the two people he'd left clinging to each other at Townsend. 

He'd thought, a year ago, that it would be hard to leave Fox if his plan worked. Now he laughed at himself cynically, marveling at how much harder it was going to be to leave them both. 

"What's so funny?" a soft voice came from the house. 

He turned and saw Dana silhouetted at the sliding door. She stepped outside to him and put her arms around his waist. The warmth of her nestling form made him aware of how chilly the February night was and he shivered belatedly. 

"So? You gonna share the joke with me?" she asked. 

He laughed again and it still sounded bitter. "The joke's on me," he said. "Another cosmic joke at my expense." 

He kissed her head, then pushed her arms away and sat down. "How come you're here so late? I figured you'd stay at Townsend all night." 

"I couldn't find you and I thought you'd want to see Fox." 

"How is he?" Alex winced at how needy he sounded. 

"Better and better. He's responding to everything they're throwing at him and his speech has cleared a little bit. He's actually speaking a few words." She sat down beside him, squeezing onto the chaise and leaning against him. 

Alex stood up and Dana, knocked off balance, glared at him as she got up as well. 

"Don't push me away, Alex," she said firmly. "Not before we get a chance to catch our breath. We'll talk in the morning, but right now, you look like an unmade bed and I feel like I haven't slept in months. So come inside and come to bed." 

She took his hand and pulled him toward the door and he went, telling himself he could have one last night with her. 

* * *

A soft noise woke Dana and she opened her scratchy eyes, seeing Alex standing at his dresser. His hair was shower-damp and he had just set his brush down before picking up his keys and wallet. 

She sat up and he caught her reflection in the mirror, then looked away, distressed for a brief moment that the coldness was getting easier and easier to slip back on. 

"I'm taking Elena back to Cincinnati today," he said, his voice cool and his eyes avoiding hers. 

"When will you be home?" 

"I'm not sure. Probably in a couple days. I need to see what the fallout is from this whole mess." 

She got out of bed and walked over to him, wrapping her arms around him and peering into the mirror, trying to meet his eyes. 

"You are coming back, aren't you?" she asked quietly. "You owe him and me that much." 

He finally looked up, their eyes meeting in the mirror. "I'll come back." 

He stepped out of her embrace and into the hallway. She heard him speaking with Elena and then the front door opened and closed and they were gone. 

* * *

To Alex's unspoken relief, there was no fallout in Cincinnati. Patty Aschfield was recuperating nicely. She had gone on record as saying she had released Elena into Alex's temporary custody for a family emergency. The deaths of Vince Leonard and the guard were being investigated as another sad case of workplace violence. 

When he tried to explain the nature of the bounty hunter, Patty had stopped him. "It's dead and there aren't any more of them. That's all I want to know." 

The night before he planned to return to Bethesda, Alex, with Patty's tacit permission, smuggled pizza and a six-pack of Heineken into Elena's room. They talked about harmless things from the past, avoiding the landmines of Mikhail, Lizzie and the rest of it until they were finished eating. Alex was looking through her CDs and tapes for some music when he found a surprise in her collection. 

"Did Mom give you these?" he asked, holding up a stack of cassettes. Elena leaned from her seat on the bed to see what he held. 

"Yeah, the last time she came to see me. Do you want to listen to them?" 

He shook his head quickly. "I just always wondered where they went. Is this Lizzie's?" 

"Yeah, her last recital before...everything..." Elena's voice trailed off and her eyes turned black and shadowy. Alex set the tapes back in the box and came to sit beside her. 

"It's okay, Elly." 

"No, it's not," she said darkly. "It's with me every day. I wake up and the first thing I think is that I killed my sister. How will that ever be okay?" 

Alex held her as she cried, his voice breaking with grief as he said, "Elly, I'm so sorry. I swear to God, if I'd known I would have stopped it. I would have killed him the minute I found out." 

"You killed him anyway. And ruined your chance for the kind of life you wanted. I screwed us all up." 

Alex grabbed her shoulders and shook her once. "Don't you ever say that again. None of this was you. It was Mikhail, from start to finish." 

"But Lizzie...I never told you how sorry I was, Alex. I loved her...so, so much." Elena's tears flowed faster. "I didn't want to...please believe me, I never wanted to hurt her...but Mikhail...he...he said she was ready...he was going to tell her...about the healing and...God, Alex I couldn't let him...I was too scared to hurt him and Lizzie...I saw him, talking to her..." 

Alex put his arms around her heaving shoulders and let her sob against him, his mind filled with the blood-thirsty thought that Mikhail Kryshenkov had died far too easily. 

* * *

"Can you come to see me again soon?" Elena asked, standing beside Alex's car and shading her eyes from the early morning sun. 

He slammed the door, then wrapped an arm around her waist to escort her back to the building. "I'll try, Elly. I have some things to take care of back East first." 

"Like Dana?" she asked with a sly smile. 

Alex's stomach clenched at the name, but he kept his voice light and his face calm. "Some of it's about Dana, yeah. Among other things." 

She studied him, then said, "Who was the man in the bed at the hospital, Alex? Is he one of the other things?" 

He avoided her gaze and said, "He's Will's father. He'd be Dana's husband if she'd come to her senses and marry him." 

"Oh," she said with a sympathetic wince. "So...where does that leave you, if he's going to get better?" 

He shrugged casually and held the door open for her. "I guess it leaves me where I was before he got hurt and she and I got together." 

"I'm sorry, Alex, I can tell how much you care for her." 

"I'll be okay, Tippy." 

"Don't call me that," she said with a pout and he laughed and messed her hair. 

"I'll try to get back to see you soon, Elle. Love you." He squeezed her hard and buried his face in her hair, letting her curls soak up the few stray tears he couldn't quite hold back. 

* * *

To Dana, the surest sign that Mulder was still Mulder was the impatient jerk of his head when a spoonful of oatmeal slopped down his chin. He pulled away with an eloquent grunt when she tried to coax another mouthful into him and she laughed at his glare. 

"I bet you'd eat it if I dumped a cup of sugar and chocolate syrup on it, wouldn't you?" she said, setting the bowl aside. 

He nodded, his movements clumsy and erratic, but she knew he was agreeing with her and enjoying her teasing. 

"Well, shape up or I'll make airplane noises when it's time to feed you lunch." 

He endured her wiping his chin and face, then said, his voice still rough and uncertain, "Will com'n' t'day?" 

She smiled at the daily question. "Yes, Maggie's bringing him after school. He'll be here when you get back from speech therapy. And right now, you have to go to physical therapy." 

She helped him into the wheelchair and took him to the elevator, leaving him with his therapist after depositing a kiss on his cheek. She stood at the door long after he was out of her sight, her thoughts deep and muddled, until her phone chirped. 

"Hey, it's Alex." 

The sound of his voice sent a wave of heat into her face and she headed to the lobby for a stronger signal and some cooler air. 

"Hey. Where are you? Still in Cincinnati?" 

"No, I came back last night, I'm at my place. How's Mulder doing?" 

"Really well," she answered, then hinted, "You won't believe it when you see him." 

There was a long, awkward pause and the distance in Alex's voice was unmistakable when he finally spoke. "So how awake is he? Talking? Walking? All that good stuff?" 

Screw the subtle approach, Dana thought, then said, "Why don't you come and see for yourself?" 

"Does he know I'm lurking in the shadows?" Alex asked flippantly. "I wouldn't want to shock him. Might not be good for his ticker." 

Dana despised the nonchalant arrogance in his voice but recognized it for the cover-up it was. She held back the sharp answer she wanted to give. "He'll be fine. He's been trying to ask so many questions, it's been hard keeping up with him." 

"I'll bet," Alex said with the first sign of genuine warmth in his voice Dana had heard. 

"I've explained how he got hurt, but I haven't gone through the whole saga. It will be easier to tell him the rest of it if you're here." She took a deep breath then lunged ahead. "And I've missed you the last couple days. I want to see you." 

Another longish pause and she thought she heard a tiny sigh. "Okay. Let me catch up on a few things here and I'll be over by lunch time, all right?" 

"All right. He has another therapy session at 2:30, so we'll have plenty of time to talk." 

He didn't answer, so she just said softly, "I'll see you soon." 

Soon was nearly an hour later. Dana was trying to read in the lounge when Alex stepped off the elevator. He looked tired; his eyes were shaded purple underneath and a heavy bruise still discolored his forehead. 

His mind was clearly elsewhere-he almost walked past her until she cleared her throat to catch his attention. When he came close enough, she put her arms around him automatically and kissed his cheek. She intended to linger but he pulled away subtly and slid around her to sit on the couch. 

Dana stared at him intently, trying to read his face and posture. Finally, she asked after Patty Aschfield, looking for neutral ground. 

"Patty's okay. She's still in the hospital. The shooting is being passed off as workplace violence. It's not going to help Vince Leonard's reputation, but it'll keep the wrong people from hearing about what happened." 

Dana waited for him to wind down, then sat beside him and took his hand. "And how are you?" she asked. 

"I'm fine," he said, almost convincingly. "I'm tired as hell from the last week of complete chaos, but otherwise..." He tried to pull away again, but she squeezed as tightly as she could. 

"Alex, you and I..." 

Alex managed to pull away when the nearby elevator dinged its arrival. Dana shot him a worried look as she hurried over to the opening doors and greeted Mulder as an orderly wheeled him out. 

Alex stayed determinedly calm while Dana knelt beside Mulder and spoke quietly to him. Long years of practice allowed him to school his face into a placid, friendly mask rather than let the heart-pounding elation he was feeling light it up. 

Mulder looked confused at first, until Dana stood up and moved behind his chair. He saw Alex immediately and strained to look back at Dana. 

"Tha's my vis'tr?" he croaked. 

"Yeah, that's your visitor," she said with a warm smile. 

Mulder turned his head back slowly, staring at Alex, his face expressionless. Alex began to feel uneasy, not knowing if the face was blank because of anger or injury. He tried to swallow unobtrusively, but Dana didn't miss the quick movement and she leaned down to speak in Mulder's ear. 

"Are you going to say hello?" 

"H'lo, Kr...kryshek," he said, fixing his eyes intently on Alex's face. 

"Hey, Mulder," Alex replied dispassionately. "You're looking better than the last time I saw you." 

Dana's eyes narrowed at Alex's casual tone, astounded that he could stay so detached when his wildest wish was coming true right before his eyes. 

"Let's get you back to your room, Mulder," she said, pushing him forward. She passed Alex with a searching look that he returned with a bland smile, falling into step behind the two of them as they moved down the hall. 

Alex stood aside while Dana manhandled Fox back into his bed and looked away as she reached beneath the blanket to adjust his catheter. 

"I'm going to get your lunch tray. You and Alex visit and I'll be right back." She walked out with a swift backward look, still disturbed by Alex's indifferent voice. 

The two men eyed each other until Mulder wheezed out, "Starin' at a cripple's no' nice." 

"Still quick with a joke, that's good to see," Alex said with a genuine smile. "So, miracle man, how are you feeling? Anything hurting?" 

"M' pride hur's. Wired t' piss. Scully feedin' me," Mulder answered with a vague wave at the catheter bag hanging on the bed rail. 

"Yeah, well, it's going to take some time. You've got a lot of fixing to do." 

"I know." 

The room grew quiet as Mulder regarded Alex closely, seeing changes and thinking of too many questions to ask at once. He couldn't wait any longer to ask the biggest one, though and, clearing his rusty throat, said, "Why'r you here?" 

Alex lowered his eyes to hide the chilled response that rippled through him at the suspicious voice. At last, eyes still fixed on the floor, he said, "I came here to help you. And Dana and Will." 

A snuffly laugh brought his eyes back up. 

"What's so funny?" 

"If you call her Dana, she'll kick yr' ass." 

"She doesn't mind." Alex relaxed at the slightly warmer tone and took a seat in the recliner, feeling like he might get through this without falling apart. "You're the only one allowed to call her Scully." 

"You say you're helpin', what're you doin'?" 

"Nothing much," he hedged with an evasive shrug, then stood up when Mulder began struggling to move. 

"Hang on, let me help. You want to sit up?" He adjusted Mulder's position effortlessly, trying not to let this first contact overwhelm him. 

Mulder settled onto his pillow with a sigh. "Har' work t'day." 

"Therapy was hard today?" 

Mulder nodded and Alex smiled again. "It's supposed to be. Gotta get you strong again." 

Mulder didn't respond to that, instead pushing out another loudly nagging question. "Y' safe here?" 

"Me?" Alex shrugged. "As safe as I am anywhere." 

Alex heard Dana's footsteps in the hall and she came in with a tray of food for all of them. He pushed away the thought that he recognized her step instantly as he swung the bed table around and helped Dana set up Mulder's lunch. 

"So," she said as she helped him wrap his fingers around a spoonful of applesauce, "what have you boys been talking about?" 

"Not much," Alex answered. "Have you told him about the Knicks disbanding yet?" 

Mulder's eyes popped wide and he choked, sending applesauce splooting across Dana's hand. Alex tried to hold back his snigger at her scowl. 

"Very funny, Alex," she berated him dryly, then gave Mulder a concerned look when he choked once more. "Don't listen to him, Mulder. The Knicks haven't done anything except end up in last place for the third season in a row. Nothing's changed since last time you saw them." 

"...Alex?" he managed to croak out in disbelief. The disbelief became astonishment when he saw Dana shoot a sheepish grin at Alex. 

"I think," she said resignedly, "that we need to tell you what we've been up to for the last year." 

"We?" Fox asked weakly. 

"You should eat first," Alex interrupted as Fox tried to speak. "We can talk afterwards." 

"As long as you don't spring anymore bullshit on him," she retorted, loading up the spoon again and giving Alex a warning glare. 

"Ma'am, yes, Ma'am," Alex said with a smarmy salute. 

The easy interchange made Fox dizzier than anything else had since he first woke up and he looked from Alex to Dana and back again all the time she helped him eat. 

Alex volunteered to return the lunch tray and as soon as he was out of sight, Mulder turned incredulous eyes to Dana. 

"Alex?" he repeated. "He's Alex all sudden?" 

"Not really all of a sudden," she replied gently. "There's so much that's happened, Mulder. I don't even know where to start." 

"Star' with why he's here. He shouldn' be near you an' Will. 'S'not safe." 

"It's been safe for almost a year. And if Alex hadn't come to me, you would never have come back." 

"How...he says he' helpin'. What'd he do?" 

"It's a long story," came Alex's voice from the doorway. He slouched against it, arms crossed, a perfect study in sang-froid. Dana hated the sight of it. 

"So tell me. I go' plenny time." 

Alex laughed lightly and came into the room. "I guess you do at that. All right, Mulder, prepare to be enthralled." 

Dana and Alex spent the next half-hour relating their story. Dana raised her eyebrow more than once as Alex deftly maneuvered around anything touching on his feelings for Mulder or any hint that he had told Dana about the past the two men shared. 

Dana felt almost ashamed at the pride that washed through her when Mulder expressed his amazed approval of her willingness to look beyond the rational for a cure for his injuries. 

They worked around to the reappearance of the bounty hunter. Alex soothed Mulder's agitation as best he could, assuring him that the hunter hadn't been able to find any of its kin. 

"I'm going to check out some hot spots," he concluded and Dana shot him a searching look. "Just to satisfy my own curiosity." 

"Same places?" 

"Yeah. New Mexico and Kentucky. That spot outside Brussels. Tunisia again, just to make sure." 

An odd look crossed Mulder's face at the last site mentioned and he said, "You don' have to go back there." 

Alex quirked a smile at him that was finally warm and real. "It's okay. It won't bother me. Anyway..." 

Before he could go on, they heard small, quick feet scurrying down the hallway and Will popped through the door, his face eager and happy. 

"Dad!" He ran to the bed and would have leaped onto it if Dana hadn't grabbed the back of his shirt. 

"Gently, Will, come on." 

"'S'okay," Mulder said with his own vibrant smile. "C'mere, Bud." 

Will climbed up beside his father, only then noticing Alex. "Hey, you're back from your sister's. Is she okay now?" 

"Yeah, Will, she's much better. Thanks for asking." 

"Did you see Frizzy Lizzie while you were there?" 

Dana shushed him, but Alex said, "No, Will, Lizzie died a long time ago. When she was a girl." 

"I'm sorry," Will said, the honest sympathy of a child adding weight to the words. 

"So am I," Alex said simply. "Hey, have you started soccer practice yet?" 

"No, not til March. I can't wait for you to come to one of my games. Mr. Hale has been teaching me all his soccer moves," he told Mulder. 

"Who...?" Mulder started to ask but Dana stepped in. 

"And Alex Hale knows all about soccer, doesn't he, kiddo?" she said, casting a meaningful look at Mulder. Some of the confusion left his face at her words. 

Will nodded enthusiastically. "He's really good, aren't you, Mr. Hale? He played in school and when he lived in Russia he played on a team there. He showed me how to shoot in the corners of the net so you can fake out the goalkeeper and if it comes off the posts you run in for the rebound before the goalkeeper can scoop it up and take the goal kick..." 

Will stopped to take a breath and Mulder looked pitifully at Dana. She laughed lightly, remembering that Mulder was tired and Will's chattering took some getting used to. 

"Will, you're talking without stopping. Remember?" she corrected gently. "You make us tired when you go so fast." 

"Sorry," he said with a charming and unapologetic grin for his father. "I forgot again." 

"'S'okay," Mulder said again, returning the grin. "I did th' same thing when I was little." 

"You did?" Will sounded delighted at discovering another link with his father. "Mom says I have a motor in my mouth." 

"I like hearin' you talk. How was school?" 

Will was off and running again and Alex watched the unabashed adoration between father and son with a well-concealed lump in his throat. 

It was nearing dinner time when Alex forced himself to his feet to leave. He had rarely seen the unguarded, blithe Mulder who had been chattering with his son all afternoon and he was loathe to walk away from the sight. He announced he was heading out for dinner and took a step toward the door. 

Before he could get farther, Will hopped off the bed and flung himself at his friend, hugging him ferociously with eight-year old exuberance. 

"Come back later and we can go to Dickson's for ice cream," he invited cheerfully. "We haven't been there since before Christmas." 

Alex laughed and made an inspired suggestion. "Why don't you and I go have dinner together and let your mom and dad visit? Mac and cheese at my house and then sundaes at Dickson's," he offered. 

"Yes! Can I spend the night like before?" 

Alex laughed again and answered unthinkingly, not noticing the colour drain from Mulder's face. "Sure. You and me and a soccer ball in the basement. How about it, Dana? You and Mulder can have some grown-up time and I can get a workout." 

She eyebrowed him, trying to figure out if this was another attempt to distance himself from her or Mulder or both of them. Alex met her searching gaze calmly. She couldn't bring herself to dampen Will's enthusiasm, despite what Alex's motivation in tendering the invitation may have been. 

"If you're sure it's all right," she said slowly. 

"It's fine. It'll be fun." 

"Okay. Will, you be good and listen to Alex...Mr. Hale. He's in charge." 

"Okay, Mom. I'll see you tomorrow, Dad." He climbed back onto Mulder's bed and wrapped his arms around Mulder's neck for a long minute, then hopped down and kissed his cheek before heading out the door with Alex. 

Alex took the boy's hand and their voices faded down the hallway. Dana waved as they stepped onto the elevator then turned back into the room. Mulder was slouched in his bed, a pained and bewildered expression on his face. 

"You okay with that? With Kryshek takin' Will?" 

"I wouldn't have let him go if I didn't think he'd be safe with him." 

"They goo' buddies?" 

Dana caught the troubled note in his voice and came to stand next to him. "They are. Alex has been very good to Will during this whole thing and Will is very fond of him. But Will never stopped waiting and praying for you for two years. Alex is a buddy, nothing more." 

The rattling of dinner trays interrupted anything else she might have said. They ate together, talking mostly of changes in her life since his injury, and then, with Dana curled up beside him on the bed, they watched an old movie and talked here and there about daily, mundane things. If she closed her eyes and ignored the hospital smell, they could have been any couple having an evening at home. 

Mulder sighed sleepily and tried to turn over. She got up to help him and as he rolled onto his stomach, he muttered, "I think I overdid it t'day. I hurt everywhere." 

She started kneading his shoulders and agreed. "Mmm, you're in knots. But your muscle mass is increasing every day." 

"Oh, yeah?" he answered with a cocky look over his shoulder. "Gettin buff enough for you, baby?" 

She laughed and bent down to kiss his head, moving her hands under his shirt to his back and beginning to work out the tension there. "Yeah, you're getting some great rhomboids." 

"Mmm, my rhomboids like what you're doin' back there." 

"Do they?" she answered lightly. "Roll over, let's see what your deltoids have to say." 

She helped him work onto his back, resting his arms at his sides. His eyes drifted lazily shut as she began rubbing his shoulder muscles again, working his shirt higher and higher until it lay bunched beneath his arms. 

"My delts like it, too, if you're wonderin'," he said softly after a while, the flirtatious lilt from so long ago sending a warm shiver of desire through her belly. 

She looked up to see his eyes open now, green taking over the mix of colours and the expression in them plain. She let her hands drift across his chest, her fingers dancing over his broad, flat nipples, and asked him huskily, "How about your pectorals?" 

The shiver and raised gooseflesh across his arms was the same she remembered from more than two years ago and she felt tears spring up in her eyes. Two years of not crying as he lay there and now it seemed every day brought another bout of weeping from her. And she didn't care. 

Mulder's hand caressed her cheek and she kissed it gently, not removing her hand from where it stroked across his chest and plucked at the stiffening points. 

"Lay down with me," he asked, his meaning clear in his voice and eyes. She closed the door to his room, then climbed into the bed eagerly, helping him shift over and turn on his side to face her. 

She nestled in closer to him and, when his arms tightened around her a bit, found herself giggling at the sheer joy of having him hold her once more. 

"Do I look tha' funny?" he asked, droll as ever and she laughed harder, stretching up to kiss him until he silenced her laughter by slipping his tongue between her lips. She drowned in it, burned from it and whimpered greedily when he finally pulled away to gasp for a breath. 

"More," she begged and crawled up to lay on top of him. She pulled his shirt over his head and took his mouth again, pressing her hips against his. He was half-hard and she could feel his cock swelling bigger against her belly. 

She ignored the tears that were still leaking from her tightly shut eyes, stroking his shoulders and chest. When her fingers slid over his pebbly nipples, he jerked up and groaned into her mouth. 

"Do you like that?" she asked. 

"God, yes," he groaned again and she tweaked both peaks more firmly. 

Alex's words from months ago came to her and she leaned up to watch his face as she pinched him hard. He gasped and whispered something, his whole body arching, looking for more stimulation. 

"What do you want, love?" she asked with a satisfied smile in her voice. 

"...harder," he whispered louder and bit his lip when she complied, rolling the tips between her fingers harshly while she pressed against him again. He tried to meet her thrusts but his body wouldn't cooperate and his groans became laced with frustration. 

"Wan' you," he muttered. "Dana, please..." 

She pulled her mouth from his and pushed herself up to her hands and knees, hovering over him and drinking in the sight of him, hard and hungry for her. More tears came but she shook them away impatiently and trailed kisses down his body, nuzzling the waistband of his pants out of her way. Once her intention became clear to him, he stopped her with a hand tugging clumsily at her shoulder. 

"No, no' that. I want you. C'mere." 

She sat back on her heels and looked at him. "Do you think you're strong enough ...?" 

"Le's find out." He gave her his trademark leer as best he could and she laughed in spite of the surges of want darting through her body. 

"You tell me if you need to stop, promise?" she demanded. She slid her jeans down and off, tossed her shirt aside and straddled him. 

"I'm not makin' any promises," he declared. "Been two years since I go' laid. I'm surprised I didn' explode." 

She breathed out a long, happy 'Oh' as she lowered herself and let him fill he. She held herself still for a time, not wanting anything more than to revel in his return to her body. 

Finally she began to move, one hand braced on his shoulder, the other skimming softly from one nipple to the other. His fingers were clumsy as they roamed across her hips and belly-he tried to reach up to her swaying breasts but couldn't manage it. 

"Sorry," he said breathlessly and she put a finger to his lips. 

"I'm not. You're here-oh, god, Mulder, you're here." She moved faster, her arousal flaring higher as the comprehension swept over her again. Her fingers began working his nipples once more and the instantaneous reaction to one rough tweak encouraged her to turn up her efforts. She pulled and twisted the bits of flesh harder and grinned at the sudden arch of his body and breathy gasps of 'yes' and 'more'. 

Their pace increased until Dana was raising completely off his cock and slamming herself back down, jarring a grunted word from Mulder with each impalement. She lost herself in the fullness and heat of his cock within her and his beautiful face below her and his ragged cries in her ears. 

She stopped thinking about how hard she was squeezing and twisting and pulling at his nipples, harder than he could ever remember her doing before. The pain-spiced sensation coupled with the sight of her flushed, panting face and the sound of her chanting his name engulfed him, blotting out everything else until he exploded inside her with a weak howl. 

They clung to each other, sweat-soaked, shaking and panting. Dana lay exulting across Mulder's still-thin chest, basking in the return of something she'd thought was gone forever. He was almost asleep, his body exhausted as it learned how to work itself again. He sighed happily and Dana lifted her head enough to look at him, admiring the shine of passion in his sleepy eyes until they fluttered one last time and he slept. 

* * *

They were finishing breakfast when Will and Alex appeared in the doorway. Will bounded into the room in his usual fashion, a bag from Mulder's favorite bakery in his hand and three sentences tumbling out of his mouth before he was all the way through the door. 

Alex came in more slowly carrying two cups of coffee, a third tucked between his waist and elbow. He was laughing at Will's description of their 'guys night' while he tried to balance the cups. At the sight of him, Dana felt a wave of something new sweep over her, a mix of desire and affection that took her by surprise with its strength and heat. 

Alex turned to say something to her and was surprised in his turn to see a tender, softly hungry expression on her face. She looked away quickly and Alex, after a moment's thought, dismissed the look as pleasure in seeing Will so happy. 

Dana blushed, knowing what kind of mooning look Alex's easy laughter and beautiful sparkling eyes had put on her face. She slid a sideways glance at Mulder and felt a quick chill at the confused frown he gave her. 

Once breakfast was done, Dana excused herself to the bathroom and Alex offered to return Mulder's tray. Will, tucked comfortably on Mulder's lap, was telling his father about how the basement had been turned into a laboratory the previous summer, how the chemicals smelled funny and Mr. Hale had shown him how to use some of the tools. 

"...but he packed them all up when they finished. He slept in the basement, too, even though it smelled. He still sleeps over once in a while. He forgot his sneakers when he and Mom went to see his sister in Ohio. I found them in Mom's closet. She put her gym bag on top of them. Did you know we joined a new gym? It has a rock-climbing wall and I'm going to learn how to belay-that means use the ropes..." 

Mulder hadn't heard much beyond 'sleeps over' and 'Mom.' An almost-inconceivable idea took root in his head at Will's blithe disclosure and when Dana and Alex returned moments later, he fixed obsessive eyes on them, searching for any hint of...anything. 

He couldn't stop pondering the notion of Alex and Dana together, like tonguing a canker sore, until Dana got up and chivied Will to the door, reminding him that a birthday for some faceless friend would be starting soon. 

With a quick kiss for Mulder and a promise to return soon, she left the room. Mulder watched Alex watching Dana leave, frowning at the open admiration in the man's brief, unguarded gaze. When Alex turned back to Mulder, his face was empty and his voice bland once more. Mulder, knowing the blank expression for the powerful deflector it was, felt his suspicions solidify into real fear and anger. 

Alex spoke first. "So, I bet your mind's been buzzing along at a good clip since our little story hour yesterday. Got any questions you want answered?" 

Mulder didn't respond at first, the irony of Alex's lighthearted inquiry forcing him to bite back a bitter laugh. He had plenty of questions, starting with what the hell Alex was doing sleeping in Dana's house. 

He realized that Alex was eyeing him curiously, still waiting for him to respond. 

"Dana says you an' Will are good buddies," he said neutrally. 

Alex shrugged. "He's a great kid. We spent a lot of time together while Dana and I worked and I came to like him a lot." 

Mulder tried to stop his self-destruct button from engaging, but the first question on the road to hell blurted out of his mouth. "You an' Dana buddies, too, huh?" 

Alex's eyes narrowed. He hadn't missed the slight sneer in the question and his tone was guarded as he answered it. "We spent a pretty tough couple of months working together. We had to get past all the bullshit to make this work and...you should be glad we got to be friends, it got you here." 

"And were you frien's? Only?" 

The sneer was blatant now and Alex, a chill settling in his stomach, knew what was coming next. 

"You slept with her, didn't you?" Mulder bit out. "An' don't you dare lie to me." 

Mulder's eyes were fierce and full of meaning and Alex knew he was referring to a promise he'd made Mulder long ago. 

"Still got all that profiler shit going on, don't you?" Alex asked coldly, hating the familiar pained anger that was sweeping Mulder's face. 

"You bastard," Muler growled. "Why d'you always rip me apar' like this?" 

"Rip you apart? I just spent a year putting you back together, you self-centered ass." 

"And Scully was the price? I know I owe you, but she doesn', not a damn thing." 

Alex had never felt so blisteringly angry in his life. He stood up, shaking with fury and hurt. He leaned into Mulder's face, spitting his words out. 

"Tell yourself whatever makes you feel better, but don't you dare demean her. Jesus, after the year she's had...that you would... Dammit, Mulder, she met me halfway-or more-every single time. She wouldn't sell herself, not even for you, you son of a bitch." 

His words, and everything hidden among them, infuriated Mulder, and, though still weak as a calf and as uncoordinated, he swung at Alex's face. Alex stopped the punch easily and wrenched Mulder's wrist above his head. Vicious words poised on his tongue until he saw the tears spilling down Mulder's cheek and he began to understand the disconsolate things the other man was saying. 

"God, you're taking everything from me! You an' Will ... you fucked her... you brought a hunter here. Why do you ruin everything?" 

A horrible leaden block of ice sank into Alex's stomach as he watched and listened. More than anything he wanted to kneel down and wrap his arms around the sobbing man, console him and convince him that hurting him was the last thing he ever wanted to do. Instead, he brought Mulder's wrist down and settled it gently in the other man's lap. When he spoke, his voice shook with suppressed emotion. 

"You should be thanking God you're still alive, that she loved you enough to get over hating me so we could bring you back." 

"Go 'way, Alex," Mulder said piteously. "Jus' leave us alone, please, I'm begging you. Don't take anything else from me." 

Alex, face and eyes empty, finally, said in a steady, icy voice, "I thought I was giving, not taking. My mistake." 

He turned to walk out the door and saw Dana standing there, her eyes shocked at the sound of Mulder's pleading voice and Alex's furious face. Alex paused a moment, then stepped around her. She shot out a hand to stop him and he looked down at where she touched him, then looked over her head at Mulder and, very deliberately, peeled her fingers from his arm. 

"Bye, Dana. It's been...interesting." 

"Mulder?" she asked tentatively, wondering what could have happened in the fifteen minutes she'd been gone. 

"Don't ever let him near my son again, Dana," Mulder ordered in a fierce growl. "I don't want that bastard anywhere near either of you." 

She touched his shoulder placatingly and said, "You should be glad..." 

"Shut up!" he roared, brushing her hand off him. "I'm tired of you two tellin' me I should be glad about what happened. I'm not glad. I want my two years back. I want Will to learn stuff from me, not a bastard like Alex Krycek. I want him out of your life and out of your goddamned bed!" 

"Oh!" was all she was able to gasp out before her hand flew over her mouth and her blood iced up. 

Mulder's eyes welled up once more and he said, his voice breaking miserably, "Scully, how...with Alex Krycek, of all people...I would have thought he would be the last person..." 

She felt a spark of anger at his indignation. "Glass houses, Mulder. I could say the same about you." 

Mulder's face went a clammy white and he began struggling to get out of his chair. She reached for him again to help and he jerked away, tumbling to the floor and hitting his head against the arm of the chair. She dropped to her knee to ease him back up but he rolled away once more. 

"Don' touch me," he hissed. "Just...don't." 

He squirmed awkwardly until he was leaning against the chair, his head on the seat and his eyes shut tight, tears still dripping down his ravaged face. Dana crept to the recliner opposite him and sat gingerly, watching him weep silently. It felt like hours had ticked by when he finally spoke, head still back, eyes still shut, face still twisted in pain. 

"What did he tell you?" 

She bit her lip before she answered, not certain where his worst pain lay but knowing she was scraping at raw flesh. "All of it." 

He nodded stoically, a grim smile making an appearance despite the continuing tears. "Figures. Is that why he came here? To tell you about him and me?" 

"No, he came here to help you," she said firmly, then stayed silent, knowing any further defense of Alex would only salt Mulder's wounds. She waited, the silence of the room as oppressive as the clamor of questions and confused emotions drumming in her mind. 

Finally, Mulder dragged his head up to look at her. He studied her for a few more silent minutes, then said, "I never wanted you to know about that." 

She raised an eyebrow. "About being bisexual or about screwing Alex Krycek?" 

A pale smile flickered for a moment in his eyes, then died away. "Being bi didn't matter after I fell for you." 

Her heart lightened just a bit at the tender words. "So it was Alex you didn't want to tell me about." 

He nodded, a dark and lost look on his face now. "I figured there was a limit to how much you'd put up with." 

She glared at him and said, "I don't 'put up' with anything. I love you." 

"Then why...?" he began but shook his head and turned away from her. "I don't know what hurts most, that he told you about my past with him or that he took advantage of you." 

The cool, precise anger Dana had first felt went up in a flame of adolescent indignation. "Took advantage?" she asked hotly. "Mulder, I wasn't drunk at a frat party! Alex didn't seduce me or ...or coerce me in any way." 

"He played off your gratitude..." 

She burst into laughter and his reddened eyes widened in surprise. "Mulder, what kind of Victorian melodrama do you think this is? I didn't swap sex with Alex for your healing, for god's sake. It was mutual. Two adults in a thoroughly consensual situation." 

He was silent, looking at his hands in his lap, and she saw a tear drip onto his shirt. She dropped to her knees beside the chair and took his hands, squeezing his fingers and trying to peer into his face. He turned away, and said, his voice thick and husky, "How long?" 

"Not so long," she answered gently. "Since Christmas." 

"Do you love him?" he asked, his voice cracking as if the words were cutting his throat on their way out. 

"Mulder, I love you. Don't ever doubt that." She kissed his hands and looked earnestly into his face, reluctant to say more but knowing that any scrap left unsaid would resonate like a bomb in Mulder's mind. "I care for Alex very much, but nothing like how I feel about you. No one will ever be more to me than you. We're okay. Please believe that." 

"Nothing's okay with him around," he said positively as he tried to wiggle himself into the seat of the chair. "He's like a hornet's nest." 

Dana smiled as she helped him sit back, then took her seat in the recliner again. "He's also the man who saved your life more than once. Maybe you could have said 'thank you' before you threw him out." 

"I don't need to be reminded what I owe him, Dana," Mulder said darkly. 

"Is that why you slept with him for a year?" She asked sharply. "Because you owed him? Or was it the great sex?" 

He choked at her question, still trying to get used to the idea of her knowing how great sex with Alex could be. Before he could answer, she asked again. "What was between you and Alex, Mulder? I think I'm entitled to know, don't you?" 

He closed his eyes once more, knowing he could lose her over this and feeling a familiar pang of fear at the idea of a life without her. It never occurred to him to lie. 

After a long silence, he sighed and finally began. "The first time, at Christmas, it wasn't even about Alex as much as it was...like a kid in a thunderstorm, looking for a lap to hide in. He was there, solid and real when I hurt so much." 

Dana's eyes clouded over with a long-lived regret and he shook his head at her. "No, don't...it's done with. But it led me to Alex and that's what you want to know about, right?" 

She nodded once. "Go on." 

"There's always been something between him and I, some weird current or catalytic reaction...you know what I mean?" 

"Sort of," she said, smiling gently at his spiky hair, on end from his hands running through it. 

"Anyway, when we were in the middle of all the hell and the mess, there was a lot of tension that needed to burn off and we...well, we knew we were both flexible..." she smiled at the word "...about our orientation. It seemed, at first, like a convenient way to get laid. And Alex was so ... controlled and cold about the things we had to do, it made it better to watch him lose that control. Does that make any sense?" he asked plaintively. 

A picture flashed through Dana's mind, of the first time she'd given Alex head, how he'd shaken and moaned and practically sobbed in his pleasure and how powerful she had felt reducing him to that. "Yes, it makes sense. It evened out the power, right?" 

"Right." Mulder was quiet for a moment, then he reached for Dana's hand. "Before I keep going, I want you to know I'm not trying to hurt you, okay?" 

"I know," she answered. "None if it hurts me. I told Alex, a long time ago, that I was glad you had someone to help take away some of the pain I caused you." 

"He did, Scully. He's...he's got dark spots in him like I do. I don't know how much you know about his past ..." 

"Enough to know you've both had a lot of loss to deal with." 

"Right. Sisters, fathers..." 

He looked away once more. "But Alex never lets the dark stuff take over, he never loses himself in it, like I do. He gets angry, but he doesn't crumble. You don't know what that's like, you've never lost your anchor the way Alex and I have. And so you're not sure how to deal with it when I start sinking into the blackness. You wait it out and help me get back on my feet when it's over, but you can't reach in and pull me out of it." 

He met Dana's troubled look with a rueful grin. "You don't understand that, do you?" 

She shook her head briefly and Mulder's grin turned wistful. "If Alex was here it would make perfect sense to him. He...could keep my head above water." 

Dana swallowed heavily, but asked anyway. "Mulder, were you in love with Alex?" 

He took in a shaky breath and closed his eyes tight for a moment before nodding his head. "I was. For a long time. And I'm afraid I will be again if he stays here. I'm sorry, Dana," he whispered, finally peering at her frozen face. "I didn't want to love him." 

Her voice was low and quivery when she finally responded. "Would you have stayed with him if you hadn't found Will? If we hadn't worked things out?" 

Mulder let out a sharp laugh. "Alex doesn't 'stay', Scully. It was never an option." 

"That's not the point. Would you have wanted to stay with him?" 

His hand went back through his hair while he tried to formulate an answer. "I never considered it. When I left with Will, he barely said goodbye to us." 

"You spent a year with him, sleeping in the same bed. Didn't you guys ever talk about what any of it meant?" 

"Operative word being 'guys', no..." He trailed off with another rueful smile and Dana returned it. Mulder shook his head in confused admiration. "Isn't this bothering you, Scully? I just told you I used to love someone else, aren't you the least bit jealous?" 

"No," she said vehemently. "What matters is that you're still here." She kissed his mouth softly before steeling herself for what was coming next. "Mulder, I have to tell you something, about Alex." 

Mulder's eyes grew fear-dark and a line creased his forehead in unhappy anticipation. She laughed gently. "You need to understand why Alex came here. What happened between you two meant a great deal more to him than being a...a convenient way to get laid," she quoted back at him. 

"...more?" he answered in bald confusion. 

"Mulder, the year Alex spent with you means everything in the world to him. He loves you dearly. Enough that he came here, to me, in order to help you." 

She watched his face move through a quick swirl of emotions as he processed her words. She saw confusion and lingering concern for her in his eyes, but there was also something that spoke of the longing that she'd seen in Alex's eyes and Mulder's familiar disbelief that no one could love a person as flawed as he was. 

Finally, he shook his head. "Alex thinks I'm a complete basket case. And he called me an idiot almost every day we were together, because my spy skills weren't up to his standards. You should have heard him the night I got shot, screaming at me about being reckless and stupid." 

Dana gave him a look flooded with scorn. "This from an Oxford-trained psychologist? Alex told me about that night, that he was worried sick that you were going to die. And like any red-blooded male, he covered up his fear and vulnerability with anger. Duh." 

"Alex? Scared and vulnerable?" Mulder laughed bleakly. "Boy, has he got you snowed." 

She frowned at the sudden frustrated need she felt to protect Alex from Mulder's dismissal. "You and Alex need to talk about this, not you and me. I'll just say this-Alex has a lot of loose ends to tie up where you're concerned. And it sounds like maybe you have a few of your own, hmmm?" 

He looked at her closely, trying to find traces of the pain he must be causing her or the anger she had every right to feel. But her face was its customary calm, although her eyes had been misty through most of the conversation. 

"Dana, I don't want to...to damage what you and I have. Alex and I...that was long ago and it doesn't need to be opened up and aired out." 

She gave him a stern look. "And there were never times, after you left him, that you missed him? Still felt strongly about him? I know you, Mulder, I bet it made you miserable and moody and then you'd feel guilty over not telling me-either about caring for Alex or being bi-and then you'd spin into one of your bouts. I don't want that to happen anymore. You and Alex need to sort it all out one way or another or else it will damage us. Anytime you hold a part of yourself back from me or feel like there's something about yourself you can't tell me, it hurts us." 

He was chewing on his lip by the time her speech was over and she felt a pang of remorse at scolding him until she realized he was actually holding in laughter. She began smiling herself, knowing how bossy she sounded and Mulder, seeing her fierce expression melt into humour, let an unrestrained boom of laughter ring out. 

"You are the most amazing goddamned woman," he gasped between peals. He reached across to pull her into his lap and kiss her, both of them still laughing merrily even as their mouths tangled together. 

It was all well and good to say 'sort things out' with Alex, but Alex had disappeared and Dana was beginning to think he was gone for good. 

She had stopped by his house as soon as she left Townsend the day Mulder had begged Alex to leave, but the windows were dark and his car was gone. She stopped again on Monday afternoon, and this time, the locks were changed and the security pad had been recoded so she couldn't get inside. 

She told Mulder about her fruitless efforts and he hesitated before telling her Alex had probably gone to investigate the former activity sites they had talked about. 

"He wouldn't go without telling us, would he?" she asked worriedly. 

Mulder shrugged. "The Alex I knew would have. I haven't met the kinder, gentler Alex you keep talking about." 

* * *

After a week of silence, Dana called Anna to see if perhaps Alex had turned up there. But the older woman hadn't heard from him in weeks, not since he'd called to say he wasn't going to be returning after all. Dana had the feeling he had told his aunt a lot more than that. 

"He'll be all right, Dr. Scully, you know Alex. Like a cat, he always lands on his feet." 

"Even cats only have nine lives, Anna," she responded darkly. "He's probably on about eight by now." 

Laughter came across the line, then Anna said, "If he comes to me, I'll tell you. He simply may need some time by himself." 

They talked for a while about Mulder's healing and Dana felt a strong desire to talk to Anna about the strained situation they were all in. She couldn't find easy words to explain what she didn't understand herself, though, so she left the thorny topics of she and Alex and Alex and Mulder alone. When she hung up, she lay back on the couch, wondering how her life had become so complicated. 

It became more complicated when another week went by. Mulder's progress continued to race along-he graduated from the wheelchair to a walker in a handful of days and now he was using a pair of canes to walk slowly but steadily. 

But Alex was still gone and she missed having him there to celebrate each newly regained skill or passed milestone as all their work paid off. She spent a few more nights with Mulder, talking carefully about his past with Alex and eagerly about their future together. But some nights she spent at home, trying to think where Alex could be and why he didn't tell her he was leaving and if he was ever coming back. 

A day came when she showed up at Townsend with sleepless smudges beneath her eyes and her face pale and drawn. 

"You okay?" Mulder asked as she sat on the arm of the recliner beside him. "You look..." 

"I know how I look," she said shortly. "I didn't sleep much last night." 

"How come?" 

"Because I'm worried!" she snapped. "Aren't you?" 

"About Alex?" he asked in some surprise. "I'm sure he's fine. He always is." 

"He's not Superman, Mulder. And he's not at the top of his game right now. He's been out of it for too long and he's..." she hesitated a moment, then pushed on in a foggy voice. "...he's probably distracted and upset still. He could be...back in prison or-or hurt or..." She sank into the chair, curling against a speechless Mulder's chest, crying freely in a way he didn't think he'd ever seen before. 

A cold thought whisked through his brain as he cuddled her-another rare occurrence-and murmured into her hair. She pulled away after a few minutes of unrestrained weeping and sat up, wiping her eyes and sniffling. 

"God, I must look like hell," she muttered, self-consciously fixing her hair and struggling to keep her voice calm. 

"You look miserable," Mulder offered with a small smile. "Dana, I asked you something a while ago and I think you gave me the wrong answer." She looked at him curiously as he took her hand and kissed it. "Do you love Alex?" 

The unexpected question blindsided her, suddenly shining a light into the back of her mind where an unimaginable and frightening notion had silently taken root. She burst into tears again as the idea of loving Alex bloomed into vivid reality. 

Mulder held her tightly against his chest while she cried brokenly, whispering, "It's okay, I know. He sneaks right in, doesn't he?" 

She sniffled again, then turned her red and swollen face up to look at him, almost childishly bewildered. "Is that how it happened to you?" 

"Yeah. I just woke up one morning, saw him sleeping next to me and...that was that." 

"But I love you, I can't love him, too," she almost wailed. 

"Trust me," he said, looking down at her and brushing the messy hair from her forehead. "I did it for years." 

* * *

Alex waited down the street from Dana's home until Maggie Scully's car wheeled into the driveway and Maggie and Will walked inside. He checked his watch, judging that he had plenty of time to take care of things before Dana came back from the hospital to put Will to bed. He pulled up to the house slowly and got out, heading for the door with a set jaw. Maggie answered his knock with a bright smile. 

"Alex! It's good to see you! How's your sister?" 

"Hi, Maggie. She's fine, thanks for asking." 

"Well, come in. Will and I just got home from the hospital. Have you seen the progress Fox has made lately?" 

Alex didn't respond to her invitation, saying only, "I saw him when I got back from Cincinnati, but I've been out of town again the past two weeks. How's he doing?" 

"Amazingly well. He's walking with a pair of canes now, but I bet by the end of the month he's on his own two feet again. It's nothing less than miraculous. Did you want to come in and see Will?" 

"Actually, if you don't mind, I'd like to take him out for a treat. I haven't seen him lately, either, and I thought we could grab a burger or something. If that's okay?" 

"Sure, just have him home by 7:30. He has some homework to finish up. Will!" Maggie turned away to call and Alex's mouth tightened at the eager footsteps and bright voice that answered the older woman. 

Will stopped short at the curb when he saw the car waiting there. 

"Where's your red car?" 

"I sold it. This is just a rental until I get a new one. Hop in." 

"Is it a stick?" 

"Nope, sorry, Champ. It's just a boring old Chevy V-6. But this one has a sunroof like the old one, see?" 

They pulled away with a wave for Maggie and made their way to a nearby McDonald's. Alex ordered a soda and tried not to grimace as Will plowed through two grey cheeseburgers and some wilted fries. He listened to Will's usual spate of stories and commentaries, treasuring each babbled word the boy offered, until he took Will to their usual ice cream hangout to tell him his news. 

"This was fun," Will sighed happily over a spoonful of whipped cream. "When Dad comes home, we'll have to bring him here. He loves ice cream. He's coming home soon, did I tell you? The doctor said in another week he should be okay to leave the hospital. Mom cried like a baby when he told her. You can come to the party we're going to have for him. A welcome-home party. We'll probably..." 

"Will," Alex interrupted firmly, "I'm moving away. I won't be here when your dad comes home. That's why I wanted to see you tonight, to say goodbye." 

"You're moving? Where to?" 

"Back to Russia. My aunt and cousin have a farm there." 

Will was quickly more interested in what kinds of machinery Alex would be using then in the fact that he was going away for good. Alex watched the bright eyes and vividly expressive face as he answered all Will's questions and wondered for a moment if he was doomed to have every Mulder and Scully in the world sink their hooks into his heart. 

"Anyway," he concluded when Will's questions finally tapered off, "that's my plan. I'll write you and send you some pictures when I get settled." 

He reached into a pocket of his jacket and pulled out something very bright blue. "I never got a chance to thank you for making this for me." 

It was the picture frame Will had made and Alex had placed the photo of he and his sisters in it. "My picture was getting all wrinkled in my wallet and now I have a better place for it." 

As they walked out to the car, Will chattered unceasingly and Alex mentally planned what he would begin packing when he got home. 

Will was asleep in his bed by the time Dana dragged herself in the door. She whispered a quick good night to him and made her way to the kitchen, where she dropped into a chair with a cup of tea and a heavy sigh. 

"I can't wait till he's home and I don't have to make this drive anymore," she moaned to Maggie. "Thanks for watching Will tonight. I was with the social workers for over an hour, arranging Fox's therapy schedule." 

"Well, I actually got a reprieve for a while. Alex came by and took him to McDonald's...was that all right?" Maggie asked in sudden alarm at the look on Dana's face. 

"Alex was here? What...did he say anything about where he's been?" 

"Not really. Just that he'd been out of town for a couple weeks. He looked tired. Is something going on with his sister again?" 

Dana hedged carefully. "I think it was something to do with a former job of his. He...he didn't go into a lot of detail." 

Dana redirected her mother's curiosity by mentioning an estimated date for Mulder's discharge from Townsend and they spent a happy hour making plans for his homecoming party. When her mother left, Dana headed straight for her room, stripped off the clothes she'd had on since six that morning and snuggled herself into sweats and comfy slippers. 

She went back to the couch and picked up her book, but it sat open in her lap while she stared mindlessly at the lamplight reflected on the living room window, her mind racing around trying to corral her unruly thoughts. 

She had Mulder back in her arms and her life. Soon he would be back in their home. She should feel like the gates of heaven were opening up in front of her, but all she could think of tonight was how much she missed Alex-quirky jokes and velvety voice, broad shoulders and bright mind. 

She laughed as she thought of telling Mulder that he needed to sort things out with Alex. Heal thyself, she thought with a sardonic snort. Apparently she had some sorting of her own to do. She slouched on the sofa, quiet in the dark, telling logic and mental precision, for once in her life, to stuff it while she figured out what on earth she was going to do. 

She woke up much later, still slumped on the couch, when Will's sleepy voice called to her. She went to the doorway of his room and asked, "What is it, sweet?" 

"Mr. Hale took me to McDonald's for dinner," he answered, his bleary smile dimly lit by a night light. 

"I know. Grandma told me. Did you have fun?" 

"Yeah. We went for sundaes after and he told me about his farm." 

"His farm?" she asked, feeling a quick ripple of worry. "What about it?" 

"He has a horse because tractors make smoke that makes the apples taste funny." An enormous yawn cut off the end of his sentence and Dana smiled at the tired face indulgently. 

"Go back to sleep, sweetie. You can tell me more in the morning, okay? And we'll go see Daddy after school." 

"...'kay," he mumbled and Dana stepped into his room to drop a soft kiss on his forehead. "Love you, Mom." 

"You, too, baby. See you in the morning." 

Dana squared her shoulders as she headed down the hallway towards Mulder's room, knowing what kind of afternoon she was letting herself in for. Once in the room, she kissed him fervently and then pulled away, looking searchingly into his eyes. 

"We have to talk." 

They spent the next two hours, some of it stormy and tearful, laying themselves bare about not just the effect of Hurricane Alex on both of them, but about long-hidden fears and old wounds and secret sorrows. 

By the time Will appeared with Maggie in tow, Dana and Mulder were tear-streaked and exhausted. They exchanged looks that said, 'more later', and settled down to share the meal Maggie had prepared. She was fussing over Mulder in a way that made Dana love her generous mother more than ever. 

Will recounted his day while they ate and Mulder laughed heartily over a tale of lunchroom politics that had apparently quite scandalized the second-grade. 

Will switched gears, as usual, before Mulder had finished laughing and caused his father to choke when he said, "Mr. Hale told me he's going to his farm. We had McDonald's yesterday, but he didn't eat anything. He has a horse, did you know that? And he's going to ride him to the fields every day. They plow with oxes there still..." 

"Oxen," Maggie corrected gently, not noticing Mulder's pale face or Dana's troubled eyes. 

"Mr. Hale is going to visit?" Mulder asked carefully. 

Will shook his head. "Nope. He's going there to live. His uncle-no, his cousin-is getting old and needs more help. I asked him if he was going to wear overalls and we both laughed really hard." 

Dana couldn't hold back a hysterical gulp of laughter at the mental image of Alex in overalls, but when she saw the dark, hungry look in Mulder's eyes, her humour died instantly. She and Mulder exchanged another eloquent glance and the rest of the meal passed quickly. 

Dana walked out with Maggie and asked her, away from Will, if she could take him home and stay while Dana talked with Fox about something important. 

Maggie raised a Scully eyebrow at her and said, "Are you going to tell him about you and Alex?" 

Dana smiled wryly. "He knows about Alex. We've had plenty of discussion on that topic, believe me. But there are other things we need to sort out, so..." 

"Don't worry about Will. I can stay overnight if you'd like." 

"No, not tonight. I'll be home. Maybe late, but I'll be there." 

She kissed Maggie's cheek, then gave Will a tight squeeze and a kiss as well before heading back down to Mulder's room. 

He was standing at the window, looking down at the moonlit yard, his eyes cloudy and his teeth tugging at his lip. She came to stand next to him, resting her head on his shoulder and wrapping her arms around his waist. They didn't talk for a long time, until Mulder whispered, "I don't want him to run away from us." 

She whispered back, "He's running from you, love." 

* * *

Mulder found himself standing on Alex's porch, listening to disjointed sounds from inside the house and trying to calm his roiling thoughts. The noise inside began to organize itself into scales and Mulder listened for a few moments before knocking, then opening the door. He followed the sounds to the family room where Alex sat with his cello between his knees, tuning the instrument carefully and unaware of Mulder, peering into the room.

He watched and listened, captivated, for a while before saying, "Is this a bad time, Maestro?" 

Alex looked up. His jaw tensed up and his eyes flashed angrily for a moment before the bland mask dropped into place and he turned back to the cello. "They let you have car keys already?" 

"No, I took a cab." Mulder looked around the room. Half-filled boxes were stacked on the worn out sofa and, looking into the kitchen, he could see more boxes sitting on the counters. Some of the cupboard doors were ajar; he could see that the cupboards themselves were empty. "You going somewhere?" 

"What do you think?" Alex's focus seemed to be solely on the play of his fingers across the strings. 

Mulder came further into the room, taking a seat on the sofa after moving a pile of books aside. He kept his eyes fixed on Alex, who tried to concentrate on the keys and strings of the instrument until he finally set it down with an exasperated grunt. 

"What do you want, Mulder?" 

"I want to talk to you, but I can wait till you're done." He waved at the bow in Alex's hand. "Go on. This is fascinating." 

Alex looked at him for a few moments, than shrugged and resumed his work. 

It was only another minute before Mulder started talking again. Right on schedule, Alex thought with a cynical grin. 

"I didn't know you played anything besides the piano." He sounded mildly indignant and Alex's grin widened. 

"You never asked. I play a couple instruments." 

"What else?" 

"I thought the third degree could wait till I was done?" Alex said, setting the cello aside once more and getting up. 

"Sorry," Mulder said a bit self-consciously. 

Alex walked into the kitchen, saying over his shoulder, "You want a soda or a beer or something?" 

Mulder followed him. "Just water." 

Alex leaned into the refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of water and a Coke, then set them on the table and sat down across from Mulder. 

"So," Alex asked casually, "are you here to avenge Scully's virtue?" 

Mulder felt a flush of angry heat flood his face at the sardonic tone and had a moment's doubt that Scully was right, that this cold, sneering man was desperately in love with him. "Actually, I'm here to...well, to apologize." 

Alex's brow lifted, giving Mulder a creepy feeling that Alex and Scully had been spending way too much time together. 

"Scully and I talked, after you took off. She was pretty pissed off at me for assuming it was anything but mutual and consensual." 

"Well, I'm glad she backed up my statement, Officer." 

"And," Mulder continued impatiently, "once I had settled down, I realized that you were right about Scully, that she wouldn't stoop to trading sexual favours for anything." 

"But I would, right?" Alex laughed darkly. "Mulder, that is the sorriest excuse for an apology I've ever heard. You need to brush up on your technique." 

"Fine," Mulder exasperated. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have assumed you were working the situation to your advantage. Okay?" 

"De nada," Alex said and, as casually as he could manage with trembling fingers, pulled his cigarettes from his shirt pocket and lit one. Mulder's eyes widened. 

"When did you start smoking?" 

"About an hour after the first time I talked to Dana about all this shit." Alex blew a smoke ring towards the ceiling, waiting for whatever else Mulder had to say and wondering how the man could piss him off and twist his heart at the same time. 

"Alex, I am sorry. You've done so much... 'thank you' doesn't even begin to say it. And there's no way I can repay you, especially for this." He touched the rings on his hand briefly and Alex looked away. 

"I'm not looking to be paid, Mulder," Alex said coldly. "Not from you or from Dana." 

He got up and went to the window over the sink, slid it partway open and blew his smoke into the yard, trying to relax his shaking hands and tight throat. 

Mulder watched Alex's back, watched the tension in his shoulders and the tiny tremors in the graceful fingers that lay on the counter. Now that he knew to look for it, he could see there was something simmering underneath Alex's blank face. 

And, Mulder acknowledged silently, the man was still beautiful enough to tempt the saints. He stood up slowly, recognizing that the bond that had always hummed between them was as strong as ever. 

Alex felt a sudden warmth behind him, then saw Mulder's hands settle on the counter and bracket his body. A heated mouth kissed the back of his neck and sent a wave of desire slamming into his gut. His chin dropped to his chest, his heart was thumping in triple time and his dick turned to stone in remembrance. But Alex could only hear, in his head, the loud echo of Mulder's words: 'Repay you.' 

"What are you doing Mulder?" he heard himself ask in a husky voice. "Stooping to something Scully wouldn't?" 

He felt the other man tense and then the weight holding him was gone. He turned around, eyes downcast as he tried to step around Mulder. 

Mulder's voice was angry as he grabbed Alex's arm to stop his escape. "You think I'm looking to pay you back for saving my life? Maybe another blowjob on the kitchen floor? That's what I paid last time, wasn't it?" 

"Shut up," Alex muttered, pain filling him at the thought that it might have been gratitude all along. He flinched when Mulder's arms circled his waist. 

"Do you think that's what it was, Alex? The whole year?" Mulder growled in his ear. "That I stayed in your bed because I was grateful?" He kissed the back of Alex's neck more firmly, nipping once, then stepped away and pulled at Alex's shoulders until he was facing him. 

Alex's face was pale and he spoke through gritted teeth, trying and failing to keep the quaver out of his voice. 

"Who knows what goes on in that brain of yours, Mulder? Look, apology accepted, now just go back to Dana and Will and have a great life." 

He pulled away and Mulder reached for him, losing his uncertain balance. Alex grabbed his shoulders to steady him but Mulder, never one to waste a serendipitous moment, let his knees collapse and dropped them both to the ground. 

Alex rolled to take the impact of their combined weight and found himself lying beneath Mulder, the hazel eyes dark with heat, barely an inch above his own. A sweetly mischievous smile bloomed over Mulder's face and he tilted his hips down to find Alex hot and hard against him. 

"Mulder..." Alex choked out, all pretense of calm gone, his eyes wide with panic and his breath heavy. 

Any other words he might have spoken were swallowed by Mulder's mouth swooping down on his, his tongue ruthlessly pushing into Alex's mouth. Alex thought disjointedly that the man shouldn't taste the same, that years had passed, he'd almost died, and the tang and richness of Mulder's flavour ought to have faded some by now. 

Another press against Alex's stone-hard cock and a half-stifled moan slipped out of Mulder's mouth. It tickled Alex's lips and he thought for a moment that he was going to come in his jeans. He couldn't seem to stop lifting himself into Mulder's erection even though he knew what a horrible, really bad idea this was. But Mulder was reciprocating every grind and thrust and Alex lost track of why it was a bad idea. His head rolled back, leaving his throat bare to Mulder's teeth and lips and his fingers clenched convulsively in the carpet they lay on. 

"God, Alex, I want you," Mulder husked, then sucked avidly at Alex's neck and ear, moving back to his mouth, diving inside to sweep over and around Alex's tongue. His hand slid beneath Alex's shirt and, once on Alex's bare skin, made the other man squirm and lunge upward. He pulled away once more and tilted Alex's head to meet his dark gold eyes. 

Mulder had loved this, the rush of power he'd always felt at reducing the cool and impassive man to this writhing and moaning puddle beneath him. He reached between them for the bulge of Alex's erection, tracing out the thick head and the tight outline of his balls. He tried to loosen the button and zipper, but his awkward hands couldn't manage it. 

"Open your fly for me," he ordered gently against Alex's ear and the other man didn't hesitate, cramming his hands beneath Mulder's, working his jeans open and bucking when his own fingers brushed across his hard and overheated skin. 

Wrapping his trembling fingers around Alex's cock, he encouraged the eager thrusts within his palm. He held the other man's chin, not letting him turn from his consuming gaze and said thickly, "You are still so fucking beautiful like this. Are you getting close, Zan?" 

The beloved nickname, rasped out in Mulder's bourbon-rich voice, pushed Alex to the brink. 

"Oh, fuck..." Alex growled helplessly, losing the last bit of control over his voice, words he'd held back for years suddenly rushing out. "...love you, Lisa, love you ... love you so much...goddammit, Lis..." 

And then Alex was gone, his words and Mulder's hands overloading his senses until his cock pulsed and throbbed and finally spattered his belly with hot, milky spray. 

* * *

Mulder lay on top of Alex, watching his erratic breath, feeling the dampness across Alex's bare belly soaking through his shirt. Alex's eyes were shut now, his face turned to the side, his teeth anxiously biting his top lip. Mulder's hand, ripe and wet with Alex's semen, came up to cup his sweaty face. 

Alex's eyes opened at last, still dark and unfocused from his release and his face was unguarded and uncertain, something Mulder had never seen. The insistent throbbing in his own groin dimmed as he stared in wonder at the obvious emotions rampant on the other man's face. 

"God, Alex, do you really love me?" he finally asked in an incredulous whisper. 

Alex snapped out of his boneless stupor in a rush, the lassitude replaced by a sudden wave of anger. He heaved Mulder off him and scrambled to his feet, grabbed a handful of napkins from the table and began furiously wiping the come and sweat from his stomach and face. 

"Alex..." Mulder said from where he sprawled on the floor, but Alex cut him off with a sharp gesture. 

"Shut up. Just shut the hell up." 

He started to walk out of the room but saw Mulder struggling to lift himself. He muttered savagely beneath his breath as he helped the other man situate his canes and find his balance, then stalked into the living room. He began tossing books into the boxes and bags on the couch, randomly and angrily while Mulder slowly worked his way towards the room. 

He watched Alex's frantic packing for a few minutes, trying to see past the angry face to what was in the man's mind. 

"Alex, don't..." 

"Don't what?" Alex demanded as he continued throwing things around with a pretense of order. 

"Stop throwing stuff. You're just making a mess," he said, watching Alex dump clothes and CDs into a plastic garbage bag. "Come on, Zan..." 

"Shut up!" Alex cried fiercely at hearing the long-missed name again. "God, just ...just shut up and leave me alone." He picked up the nearest box and threw it across the room, books and papers flying everywhere. 

"You got it all, now, okay? So go home, to your family, to your precious peaceful life and leave me the fuck alone!" 

"I can't!" Mulder hollered back at him. "Not now, you fool. You...dammit, Alex, you always mess me up so goddamned much." 

Mulder stood uncertainly in the doorway until he saw a telltale shimmer streaking Alex's cheek and his heart thumped wildly. Alex, impossibly and unbelievably, was crying. He moved closer to where Alex stood with his hands clenching and unclenching, his shoulders occasionally shuddering. He turned away from Mulder as he approached. 

"Alex, I..." 

"Mulder, please. Just go, okay?" Alex's voice was raw and miserable. 

"Zan..." 

"Don't call me that again," Alex said, his voice suddenly flat and icy. "There's no Zan, there's no Lisa. There's you and Will and Dana. Now get out of here and go home to your family." 

He walked to the front door, threw it wide and turned to face Mulder. His game face was back on-you'd have to look closely for the faint tear tracks to know the man had been sobbing silently a minute earlier. Green eyes flinty, jaw set and tense, small sarcastic smirk firmly in place. They stared at one another for a long, tense time until Mulder slowly shook his head. 

"There's too much..." 

"One of us going, Mulder," Alex interrupted calmly. "If it's not gonna be you, it's gonna be me." 

He grabbed a set of keys off the console table and was out the door, down at the curb and into his car before Mulder could make his way out the door. The tires squealed angrily as the car sped away, leaving Mulder standing forlorn on the porch. 

Spring had finally pushed aside the dirty greys and browns of the Maryland winter. Will's soccer season had started, Maggie and Dana were cleaning out the flower beds and vegetable garden and Mulder had been home for almost a month. 

The homecoming party had been huge-even Bill and Tara Scully had come to town for the festivities and Bill had been almost cordial to Mulder. The Gunmen, Skinner, a handful of staff from Townsend, neighbors and Dana's colleagues-it should have been a jubilant occasion, but Dana and Fox caught each other's eyes at least a dozen times during the party and shared the same heartsick look-the one that said Alex should have been there. 

Dana felt angry and sorrowful at his absence. He'd worked so hard-she remembered saying once that Alex would have sweated blood to bring Mulder back-and loved so much and he wasn't there to reap what he'd laboured to sow. 

They'd heard nothing from him. Mulder practically staked out the house in Bethesda until the day a moving van had pulled up, unloaded a new family's belongings and hauled most of Alex's belongings away. 

When Mulder, flashing a badge he had no business carrying, had asked what they planned to do with the items the driver had shrugged and shown them a directive from the house's owner. 

"We're supposed to clear out the former tenant's stuff and put it in storage. I guess the guy skipped out on the rent or something." 

* * *

Dana and Mulder took turns assuring each other week after week that Alex only needed some time and that soon enough he would contact them. 

But soon enough Spring was almost over and Dana found herself thinking the apple trees at Anna's farm would be in full flaunting blossom. Will had begun asking when Alex would write to him and Dana and Mulder put him off with gentle adult evasions while they exchanged gloomy looks over their boy's head. 

Dana finally bit back her pride and called the farm in Russia a half-dozen times over two days in late May, but no one ever answered and she had to assume Alex was screening calls. 

After the last attempt, there were tears streaming down her face when she set the phone back in its cradle. She wiped them away impatiently and turned to find Mulder standing across the room, watching her with sorrow-filled, heavy-lidded eyes. 

"I could kill him for making you cry." 

"Maybe...maybe he doesn't need us the way we need him." 

The tears increased and soon she was crying with the wracking sobs he had seen the first time Alex had disappeared. He came to stand behind her, enfolding her in a shaky embrace and deciding silently that Dana's happiness meant that Alex had had enough time. 

* * *

Three men, each mounted on a sturdy horse, raced down an unpaved avenue hedged on each side by showy, fragrant trees in full blossom. They each carried some sort of club or stick and they were playing a mock-polo game with a half-deflated soccer ball. One of the men had dark hair that waved in the June breeze and green eyes that sparkled with energy. With a fierce laugh, he sent the ball arcing through one of the trees, showering his opponents with the dainty flowers and the drips an earlier rain had left behind. 

A red-haired, heavily bearded rider brushed damp petals from his hair and beard as he bellowed uselessly at the back of the man. "Aloyshula, ty sukin syn!" 

Alex laughed aloud once more and shouted an equal curse over his shoulder as he turned his mount off the path and coaxed the roan into a clean jump over a bench. More gleeful shouts echoed up the pathway as the other men copied his action and a tall man, standing on the porch of the stone-fronted house, watched with a reminiscent smile at the sound of curse words and exclamations he'd been taught years ago. 

Alex slowed his horse to a walk as he neared the house, immediately recognizing the figure standing there. Mulder shielded his eyes from the setting sun and smiled brilliantly at the startled look on Alex's face. 

"Is it my imagination or does everyone around you call you a son of a bitch?" he deadpanned. 

A brief smile flickered over Alex's face as he rode closer. "Do I want to know what the hell you're doing here?" he finally said and Mulder smiled at the heavy Russian signature his speech had acquired. 

"I came to Mohammed since he blew me off a couple months ago." 

Alex gave a non-committal snort as he rubbed along his horse's neck. The other men trotted up, wary of the stranger and asking Alex if everything was all right. He nodded dismissively and the men rode off to the barn while Alex slid out of the well-worn saddle. 

"You're getting around well, then?" he asked after an awkward pause. 

"Yeah. No more canes or crutches. Just a brace on one knee." Mulder reached down and thumped the metal hidden under his jeans and cocked a pleased grin at the other man. 

Alex shook his head. "That's amazing. I was there and I still think it's amazing." Another short pause and he asked, "So, is everything else okay? Speech and...everything?" 

"Pretty much. Little things slip when I'm tired, but I'm pretty much back to where I was before." 

"That's great. I'm glad. You look good...normal." 

Mulder laughed boyishly. "Gee, no one's ever called me normal before." 

Another silence lengthened between them until Mulder set a hand on Alex's shoulder and said, "We need to talk." 

Alex kept his face empty of the sudden shuddery feeling in his stomach as he led Mulder back to the bench he'd just jumped. He took his time tying off the horse's reins, trying not to think back to the year before, sitting in that same spot with Dana. 

Mulder stayed silent and watchful as Alex rolled a cigarette. The psychologist in him knew he had to wait for the other man to speak first and he made a mental wager with himself as to how long it would take. Alex must have known the trick because he sighed after only a minute or two. 

"How are Dana and Will?" 

"They're fine. Will gave me a letter for you. I think it's mostly about soccer-he had a good season." 

"And Dana?" Alex cursed inwardly at how eagerly he'd asked that. 

"She's fine. She misses you." 

"Does she know you're here?" 

Mulder laughed shortly. "Of course. I know better than to try to ditch her anymore." He turned his face away so Alex wouldn't see his sly smile. "So how's farm life treating you? Crops healthy? Getting enough rain?" 

Alex laughed at the gentle tease. "I'm enjoying myself. It's...uncomplicated." 

"As opposed to what you left behind?" 

Alex snorted rudely. "Complicated doesn't begin to describe what I left behind and you know it." 

Mulder turned back to face him, all traces of humour gone and a solemnity in his eyes that Alex had never seen there before. 

After studying Alex for a long, uncomfortable time, Mulder reached across to gently smooth down the wind-ruffled hair and said, "When you and I were together, in California...we never talked about what any of it meant to us. I'm sorry about that. If I had known..." 

Alex cut him off. "What, you would have stayed to play house with me?" He gave a brittle laugh and slid away from Mulder's unnerving warmth. "Bullshit. You were going to go back to Scully regardless of anything I said or did." 

"Did you ask me to stay?" Mulder asked. "I don't recall ever seeing you on bended knee with a bouquet of roses." 

Alex looked up with a brief lopsided grin. "I was on bended knee a few times, don't you remember?" 

Then he shook his head, his face becoming stern again. "You made it clear you wanted a life with Dana and Will. You told me you still loved her, you had your son back, you had everything you were fighting for. Where the hell did I fit in there? Why would I set myself up to have my heart ripped apart?" 

"Did it ever occur to you that I fell in love with you, too?" Mulder asked gently. 

Alex stared wildly, the angry flush of his face suddenly fading. "You...," his voice sank to a rough whisper. "I ...you and Dana...we..." 

Mulder smiled. "I've don't believe I've ever seen you staggered before. It's great." 

"What....did you...you didn't ...what..." 

"I must not have said it right," Mulder said, greatly enjoying Alex's bewilderment. "I love you, Alex." 

There was a long, stupid silence that Alex finally broke. "No, you don't." 

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure I do. I've thought through it all and everything points that way." Mulder reveled in teasing Alex, thrilled for once to be on top of a situation that had the other man floored. He leaned in to kiss Alex's cheek, softly and chastely. "I like how that sounds. I love you, Zan." 

Alex scrambled frantically to get his nearly-breached walls back up. "You love Dana, Fox. Don't expect me to believe anything else." 

"I do love Dana. But...Alex, there's such a strong bond between you and I. Something has always pulled us to each other, whether we kicked the shit out of each other or fucked each other raw. I just know what to call it now." 

Alex shook his head and turned away. "You're nuts." 

"Listen to me for a minute, would you?" Mulder reached over to take the other man's hand and moved closer to him. "Dana told me some of the things you omitted about what it took for me to get better. How the energy wasn't flowing and how it wasn't until you put your other ring on that I started to come back. Right?" 

Alex shrugged. "That's what the hunter told me. That once the third ring went on, you started coming round. He said he had to push it away to keep you under." 

"Bastard," Mulder groused and Alex nodded. 

"I didn't put the ring on because I thought it would make any difference. I didn't expect anything. I just wanted...I wanted you to have something of me after I left." 

"I know. But listen to what I think, Alex. I know I'm not an easy person to live with. And Scully finds me overwhelming sometimes, especially when I'm being moody or needy. She's always been able to help me find some measure of peace when I feel like the world's out to get me. But there are times when she really doesn't understand me, when I really upset and worry her." 

Alex scoffed. "Come on, Mulder, if anyone is ever going to understand you, it's Dana." 

Mulder shook his head. "She knows all of me, but she doesn't understand my ugly spots. Not like you do." 

Mulder reached to turn Alex's face back to him. "When I would get lost in the darkness, you always brought me back. You know about being so angry you just want to tear things apart. And you know how to get beyond it, to set it aside and do what needs to be done. Scully doesn't have a place in her like that. And more than once since you and I split up, I've heard your voice in my head, pulling me out of that darkness again." 

He stroked Alex's lean jaw, smiling gently at the way Alex's tight expression softened at the touch. "Alex, Scully gives me the stability I need to keep from flying off with every stray wind. And you keep me from sinking all the way into the nasty little hells I make for myself. I needed you both to come back. And I think I need both of you to keep me going." 

Alex looked away from the earnest hazel eyes. "Even if you do, what difference does it make? You want a life with Dana and Will and I'm not a part of that." 

"Yes, you are," Mulder answered shortly. "Seeing you with them... you would be a part of their lives whether I had gotten better or not." 

"Maybe I don't want to be part of their lives, did you ever think of that?" he argued with an obnoxious tone. 

"Is that too complicated for you, Krycek?" Mulder sneered in return. "You want simple? How's this? I love you. Dana loves you..." he waved off Alex's startled protest. "...Will loves you. Did you try to make that happen? Did you put more effort into making us love you than you did jumping that horse over this bench?" 

"What are you talking about? I didn't try to make you do anything!" Alex bristled up defensively only to see laughter sparkling in Mulder's foresty eyes. 

"See how simple it is?" Mulder leaned in to brush a soft kiss over the pain-wrinkled forehead, then sat back and said, "If you don't believe me, ask her." He turned Alex around so he could see Dana walking up the path toward them. 

"Oh, God," Alex groaned. "Don't do this to me, Lis. I'm so messed up with you two..." 

"Because you love us both?" Mulder asked in his ear. He wrapped his arms around Alex's chest and pulled him into a quick embrace, then stood up and went to Dana. 

"How's Will?" he asked, kissing her cheek and pulling her toward the bench. 

"Asleep, finally. Next time we have to go halfway around the world to track this idiot down, let's leave our son in his own time zone, okay?" 

"You...brought Will with you?" Alex asked almost meekly. 

"Of course," Mulder answered breezily. "Didn't you teach me to always have the big guns ready, just in case?" 

Dana bent to kiss Alex's forehead, then sat, with Mulder on Alex's other side, effectively pinning him between them. She looked at him critically and said, "He looks like he's been hit with a hammer. What did you say to him?" 

The tender smile on Mulder's face belied his casual shrug. "Nothing much. Told him you loved him." 

"I thought I was going to do that?" 

Alex suddenly jumped to his feet with an angry growl. "I'm glad you two find this so god-damned funny. You have what you want, you can afford to laugh it up." 

Dana stood up and grabbed his arm when he took a step towards the house. "Sit down, Alex. You're going to listen to us and you're going to stop acting like some second-rate Heathcliff..." 

"...or Hamlet," Mulder offered helpfully. 

"...or Hamlet," Dana agreed. 

"This isn't a joke!" Alex hollered at her, his face blotching up with angry heat. "I can't believe you're doing this to me, Dana, you know how I feel..." 

"Of course I know!" she yelled back. "I've watched you pout and pine for a year. You love him, he loves you. What's so hard about that?" She pulled on his arm to draw him closer and said, far more gently, "It doesn't always have to be heartbreak and torment, Alex." 

"I don't know anything else," he spat at her bitterly, then took the final step into her embrace, resting his head on top of hers and beginning to cry. "I love you, Dana. I love you both. And I don't know what to do." 

"You come back to the States with us," she said into his ear. "We'll figure everything out." 

"It's not that easy," he sniffled, then shot a glare at Mulder's soft laugh. Mulder stood up and came to stand behind Alex, wrapping his arms easily around both of them. 

"It can be," he said, his rich voice gruff with emotion. "The hard part's already done, we've found one another." 

Alex stared, first over his shoulder at Mulder's mocking grin, then down at Dana's tender smile. An odd lightness started buoying up in his chest, relentless though delicate, and he let himself peek at the possibility of what the two people in front of him offered. He said, his voice halting in a last-ditch effort, "Lis, you and Dana..." 

"...love you," Mulder edged over whatever else Alex had planned to say. "That's all you need to worry about." 

"You told me to grab the good stuff that came my way," Dana whispered against his neck. "That's what I'm doing. I love you, Alex. Please come home with us." 

Alex let his head drop down to Dana's once more and put his hands over Mulder's where they crossed his chest. 

"You shouldn't love me. Either one of you. But...are you sure? Really, really sure?" 

"We wouldn't be here if we weren't," Dana chided gently. 

"Come on, Alex. All that hard work, don't you want to get paid for it?" Mulder asked with a teasing wag of his eyebrows, telling Alex how very little gratitude had ever had to do with anything that had happened between any of them. 

The bubbly feeling in Alex's chest burst out of him in a broad laugh. "The wages of sin? I don't come cheap, you know," he answered with a matching smirk. 

"As long as you come hard, 'Sandr, that's all I care about," Mulder leered and pulled Alex, still nestling Dana against his chest, into a blistering kiss. Mulder stepped back only when Alex's horse, still tied to a low branch, stamped its hooves impatiently. 

Alex laughed as he stepped away from them and pulled himself into the roan's saddle. He reached his hand to Dana and she took it, letting him haul her up and set her in front of him. He looked back down at Mulder and gave him a breathtakingly boyish grin the other man had never seen before. 

"I have the strongest urge to ride off into the sunset over there," he said playfully, gesturing to the far western fields that were pinked and purpled in the dusky light. "Come on, Lis. Mount up." 

"I'd hate to kill your horse," Mulder drawled easily. "How about I ride something else a little later?" 

Another quick wiggle of his eyebrows set the three of them laughing together and Mulder reveled in the way Alex's smoky tenor blended with Dana's silvery contralto. He waved them off and watched as the horse stepped into an easy canter, feeling, for the first time in his life, perfectly happy. 

128   
  

If you enjoyed this story, please send feedback to Liz OBrien


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